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Archive for December 19th, 2007

19
Dec

Kim Cattrall’s Fur (No, Not That Fur …)

PETA is blabbing today that Sex And The City co-star Kim Cattrall (whose finest acting work, in my opinion, was back in Porky’s) is so anti-fur that she’s giving all the white mink numbers from the SATC movie to the animal rights group. So they can donate them to the homeless.

First of all, I’m sure the movie’s wardrobe mistress won’t mind parting with the fur coats. By the end of the film, they’re bound to be worthless anyway. See, the plot involves Cattrell’s character, Samantha, getting attacked by animal rights crazies with red paint because she’s wearing fur in the first place. I think PETA used to do a good deal of that themselves, back in the day.

And second, wasn’t this Kim in the “March Madness” issue of FHM a few years ago?

kim-cattrall-fur-pic.jpg

At the time, The Dallas Morning News described the photo as “mature beauty Kim Cattrall, in a fur coat, lying on a fur rug.” I doubt the rug is actual fur, but that Chinchilla jacket looks like the real thing.

It’s been widely reported that Cattrall only agreed to expand the SATC franchise to the big screen because of the promise of a $5 million paycheck. I wonder how much PETA is paying her to pretend she doesn’t own any dead animals?

19
Dec

Hooey 101

jlspears2.jpgThe National Enquirer may have pulled the trigger a few months early on the Jamie Lynn Spears pregnancy story. But when it ran in July, lawyers for the Spears family threatened legal action and sent the following letter:

Ms. Spears is a devout Christian with a spotless reputation, who lives in accordance with the highest moral and ethical standards in accordance with her faith.

There is no ā€œrumorā€ concerning Ms. Spears’ (non-existent) pregnancy, except perhaps for the baseless ā€œrumorā€ just now being created by the National Enquirer.

Ms. Spears is not pregnant. It is pathetic for the National Enquirer to attempt to create a wholly baseless ā€œrumorā€ that Ms. Spears is pregnant, so it can run a malicious story and false story which would be emotionally devastating to a morally upright 16 year old girl.

The only way this could be better is if the Enquirer sues the lawyers for slandering the magazine’s credibility. They should go after the $1 million that OK! magazine has promised to pay Jamie Lynn for the rights to the first baby pictures.

19
Dec

Her Music Does the Same Thing to Me

Here’s one for the Best Worst of ‘07 file. Somehow I missed it at the time, but earlier this year it was revealed that Pizza Hut spokesblonde Jessica Simpson is allergic to… pizza! Well, unless it’s made without minor ingredients like cheese, tomatoes, and wheat. Those three things give her ulcers and internal bleeding. Yummy.

Who said she can’t act? Note that this commercial was filmed after she found out about her silly little allergies. But hey, a contract’s a contract! (Besides which, in what universe would Jessica Simpson be up for some kind of award?)

19
Dec

Deceiver TiVo alert: Couric Quizzes Edwards on Marital Fidelity

Tonight on the CBS Evening News, Katie Couric will broadcast a new Q&A segment in a series called “Primary Questions: Character, Leadership and the Candidates.” Over at HuffPo, the “Eat the Press” bloggers have posted a partial transcript from tonight’s edition. They don’t seem to have noticed the irony, however, in John Edwards’ back and forth on the timely topic of marital infidelity:

edwards-on-cbs-kouric.jpgCOURIC: Harry Truman said, “A man not honorable in his marital relations is not usually honorable in any other.” Some people don’t feel comfortable supporting a candidate who has not remained faithful to his or her spouse. Can you understand their position?

EDWARDS: Of course. I mean, for a lot of Americans– including the family that I grew up with, I mean, it’s– it’s fundamental to– how you judge people and human character– whether you keep your word, whether you keep what is your ultimate word, which is that– you love– your spouse, and you’ll stay with them.

[ ... ]

COURIC: So how important do you think it is in the grand scheme of things?

EDWARDS: I think the most important qualities in a president in today’s world are trustworthiness– sincerity, honesty, strength of leadership. And– and certainly that goes to a part of that. It’s not the whole thing. But it goes to a part of it.

19
Dec

“I Did Not Have Sexual Relations with That Woman… Miss Paressant…”*

So what’s new with Tony Parker today? Not much, just a “strongly worded statement” from his lawyer about the affair he totally didn’t have with French model Alexandra Paressant:

“Tony adamantly and unconditionally denies ever having laid eyes on this woman, let alone having had an affair with her,” says the attorney, Stanton “Larry” Stein of the firm Dreier Stein & Kahan. “The allegations of the supposed affair are entirely false and fabricated.”

See, if the allegations were entirely false or entirely fabricated, neither one alone would be enough to convince me. But entirely false and fabricated? Nuff said. Also, it’s a really good idea to hire a lawyer who includes his nickname in quotes. Like my longtime attorney, the late, great Larry “Bud” Melman.

*Try pounding on a podium to the rhythm of the words. Get it?

19
Dec

A Celebrity Nativity Scene

caseyandjls.jpgSo the question had to be asked: Who is Casey Aldridge?

He is a guy who meets a thirteen-year-old girl at church, moves in with her less than three years later, and then announces their breakup on MySpace as news breaks of his (ex?) girlfriend’s pregnancy. According to MSNBC:

“Lots of people have been worried that this relationship was moving too fast, I guess there was a good reason to worry,” says a friend of the Spears family.

Worry evidently is not the best contraceptive method. Perhaps instead of letting her teenage daughter move in with a 19-year-old man, good Christian mom Lynne Spears should have given The Talk a bit more forcefully.

19
Dec

Sweet 16

jlspears1.jpgSixteen was a good year for me. My parents bought me a car and I had my first boyfriend — not always the wisest combination, but I stayed out of trouble.

Unlike Jamie Lynn Spears, younger sister of Britney and the newest Hollywood mom-to-be. She says the father is her “long-time” boyfriend Casey Aldridge, though as of Thanksgiving, Us magazine reminds us, she said she didn’t even have a boyfriend:

But in an interview with Associated Press shortly before Thanksgiving, the 16-year-old said she did not have a serious boyfriend.

“I kind of just keep my options open,” she said. “I have a bunch of friends that I always hang out with, a bunch of guy friends.”

She now says she is 12 weeks along, but that the pregnancy won’t interfere with shooting her Nickelodeon show, Zoey 101.

In related news: Lynne Spears’ Parenting Book ‘Delayed Indefinitely’

19
Dec

“Two Americas” (One You’re Married to, and One You Knock Up)

edwards-sleeper-cover.jpgJessica Alba, Jamie Lynn Spears, and Christina Aguilera aren’t the only famous pregnant women. There’s also Rielle Hunter.

Who?

She’s not famous yet, but give her a few hours. Today’s National Enquirer is about to hit the supermarket checkout racks.

Rielle Hunter, formerly named Lisa Druck (don’t ask … I don’t know), is the alleged mistress of presidential candidate John Edwards. The Enquirer story also says Hunter is pregnant with Edwards’ child. And in hiding.

Which kinds makes me flash back to August, when Good Morning America went all gaga over how Edwards and his wife renewed their wedding vows after her breast cancer diagnosis. And how People magazine just happened to have photos of this really intimate backyard ceremony. From the August 9 GMA:

DIANE SAWYER: Let’s turn now to our ‘Picture of the Morning.” And they are new pictures and David Muir is bringing them to us. You’ve been covering the Edwards campaign.

edwards-renew-vows.jpgDAVID MUIR: Yeah. And this is an incredibly personal photograph that we’ve now gotten a chance to see. It’s the renewal of the vows in the backyard in Chapel Hill, North Carolina. The former senator and his wife Elizabeth there, with their children, Kate and the two little ones, Emma Claire and Jack. And apparently, this was an idea that they decided to do while they were back at the doctor’s office in the spring when they suspected that the cancer had come back for Elizabeth. John Edwards asking her, turning to her in the doctor’s office and saying, ‘Will you marry me again?” And Elizabeth actually told him, she said, she asked back, ‘Will you take another 30 years?” And he said, ‘Absolutely.”

Awww…. That’s sweet. Except that John was apparently making a baby with someone else around the same time he renewed his “I Do.”

His campaign platform book (see page 61) says that in an Edwards presidency, the government would “Require fathers to support their children, increase child support collection, and help fathers find work.”

All three of which appear just a bit ironic now.

Bonus points: BigHeadDC reports that Hunter met Edwards after the campaign hired her to shoot a “softer side of the candidate” promotional video.

rielle-hunter-head-shot.jpg

19
Dec

12 Days of Hypocrismas: Elitist Elf

ferrell1.jpgWill Ferrell has gotten a bit big for his britches. Autograph magazine has released its rankings of the celebrities who treat their fans the best and worst, and the self-described “mild-mannered person” has claimed last place for bad behavior. Says the magazine’s editor:

“What’s so frustrating about Will Ferrell being the worst autograph signer this past year is that he used to be so nice to fans and collectors, and a great signer. What makes him so bad is that he’ll taunt people asking for his autograph.”

Who needs fans anyway?

19
Dec

When He’s Right, He’s Right

The New York Times on the John Edwards campaign, 11/6:

Instead of broadcasting a fusillade of attack ads, Mr. Edwards is relying on himself to be the messenger. At each of his campaign stops, he reserves time at the end of his remarks to bluntly ask voters to take their roles seriously, reminding Iowans that they will narrow the field of candidates.

“In so many ways, you’re the guardians of what kind of human being we’re going to have as president,” he said. “And you get to judge us.”

The National Enquirer, today:

Presidential candidate John Edwards is caught up in a love child scandal… Rielle Hunter, a woman linked to Edwards in a cheating scandal earlier this year, is more than six months pregnant — and she’s told a close confidante that Edwards is the father of her baby!

It’s the Enquirer, so of course it must be a pack of lies. I mean, does Edwards really seem like the kind of guy who would do something like that? Come on. And besides, if his wife is terminally ill, doesn’t he have the right to continue his legacy? Hey, Republicans do bad stuff too. At least Edwards isn’t tapping his foot in an airport bathroom, right? Right?

(Hat Tip: Kaus)




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