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Archive for December 26th, 2007

26
Dec

But She’s Not, Right?

“We’re so in America’s back pocket it’s embarrassing.” — Cate Blanchett whining to the Guardian last October about the government of her home country, Australia

What is it about Australian actresses who derive most of their income from American movies that makes them say such stupid, hypocritical things? (See Toni Collette.) They make movies in Australia, right? She should just stay there, if we’re so horrible. I guess she’s infiltrated the American film industry to try to pry Australia apart from the inside. Oh wait, and also it pays lots and lots and lots of money.

On the other hand, she sure is pretty.

(Hat Tip: Tim Blair)

26
Dec

Sorry, Tony!

Remember Alexandra Paressant, that (allegedly) French (alleged) model who claimed she had an (alleged) affair with Tony Parker? If you’ve been on Mars for the last few weeks, type “Tony Parker” in the search field on the right side of the page. Got it? There you go. Well, it turns out that not only doesn’t she have any proof of the affair, but she isn’t even really who she says she is!

Somebody at the Huffington Post did some actual reporting on it. (Yes, I said the Huffington Post. Why?) Dana Kennedy looked into it for People magazine, and she talks about her findings at HuffPo. It turns out that all the pictures and videos of Paressant online are really of a German model named Hana Nitsche. Nobody reporting on the story has ever actually seen Paressant. She also invented other characters to back up her story, including a “best friend” named Ornella, played by Paressant herself. She’s like the Eddie Murphy of crazy stalkers! Before Parker, she pulled the same crap on a Brazilian soccer star named Ronaldinho, and it sounds like he wasn’t the first one. Now Parker is suing x17online to the tune of $20 million for running her story, but they got suckered too.

So, Alexandra Paressant isn’t who she says she is, Tony Parker didn’t do anything wrong, and I totally fell for it. I was careful to point out that her tales were only allegations, but in my heart I was a liar. I believed it because I wanted to believe it. Let that be a lesson, Me!

(Hat Tip: Cele|bitchy, who has more on Hana Nitsche and how she got fooled into helping Paressant’s plot along)

26
Dec

Shiloh Jolie-Pitt Wears Nikes

shilohnike.jpgAngelina Jolie may be best known for being a U.N. ambassador and adopting children from Third World countries these days, but that doesn’t mean she necessarily is against child labor: Her daughter Shiloh showed off a new pair of Nikes while hanging in New Orleans over the holiday weekend.

For all Angie knows, one of her future adoptive sons or daughters could have made those shoes under harsh sweatshop conditions. Nike even admitted as much in 2001, and Oxfam Australian’s NikeWatch program says not much has changed since.

26
Dec

Lindsay Lohan Finds Jesus, Loses Pants

lohancrucifix.jpgLindsay Lohan was snapped wearing a sparkly crucifix a few days ago. I guess that means she no longer follows Kabbalah, despite saying last year about her spiritual leanings:

“Yes, I am looking into Kabbalah. All of us need something. You have to grab on to whatever gets you through.”

I think it’s safe to say that Kabbalah, as far as “getting her through,” has failed her miserably. And if Christianity doesn’t work, then there’s always Scientology left in the Trendy Hollywood Religion catalogue. I hear it’s really tolerant of cocaine use.




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