Simon Cowell is a big animal lover. He endorses PETA. Says he’s going to leave his entire estate to crawling critters when he dies. He even does anti-fur ads — which I’d imagine doesn’t make him any friends among the richie-rich people in his social circles. So why is Animal Defenders International accusing the star of X Factor, Pop Idol, American Idol, and Britain’s Got Talent of supporting animal cruelty?
Last week on a Talent “audition” show, Cowell and co-judge Amanda Holden gave their approval to an animal magic act consisting of a husband and wife team who own 51 animals: a German shepherd dog, eight cats, three corn snakes, a python, a boa constrictor, a parrot, five gerbils, a chinchilla, a hamster eight owls, four doves, five rats, a hare and 14 rabbits.
The Aristocrats!
(Just kidding — the act is called “Animalgique.”)
The Animal Defenders group is pissed off because Cowell and Holden wanted the act’s animals to be “much bigger” next time, and because they wanted its humans to aspire to the level of Siegfried and Roy (you know — the ones who got mauled by a tiger?):
As high-profile celebrities, that have been outspoken in the past about animal welfare, it seems at complete odds for you to encourage Animalique to increase the size of their act; even specifically requesting a bigger snake … We are therefore asking that you immediately retract the acceptance of Animalique [sic] to the next stage of the competition on the grounds that animals have no place in entertainment.
No place in entertainment? None at all? Oh, yeah — that’s PETA’s Fourth Commandment (From their website):
I wonder why Sir Simon is suddenly at odds with PETA?
Oh, yeah. I’m betting all the publicity from this animal act makes him a bundle of Pounds, or Sovereigns, or Farthings, or whatever they use to buy caviar over there. Hey Simon — that’s not vegan either.
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That guy should patent his hair as the worlds first time machine. I took one look at it, and was immediately transported back to 1987.
Well, he’s not really a fan of beaver.
I love the nice, cuddly, “We Own You” feeling that PETA seems to promote here. Is there a clause in their indulgence scam where celebrities needs to follow all their commandments? It sounds more and more like a cult.
Until they sign his paycheck, I believe they are crossing the line here……
Slimon makes me laugh. A lot. But beyond my fascination with what seems to be the worst hair in show business I don’t pay him much mind.
There is all a very logical explanation for this: For thousands of years owls and beavers have waged an ancient war. And Simon Cowell is actually the evil King of the Beavers. His disguise may be devious, but you can’t fool owls. They will hunt him down during the night while he sleeps and expose him for who he is (He can’t even hide at sea… there’s owls in the Navy!)
Clearly this Animalgique is just another move by the infamous Beaver King to torment and oppress the owls (of whom we are all quite fond). The numbers are quite clear. 8 owls? And he requests more!? When will the cruelty of the terrible Beaver King ever end!?