Paris Hilton is down in Australia this week to host a New Year’s Eve party in Sydney, for which she is being paid $70,000. She shocked a few people by blowing nearly $4,000 in 40 minutes while out shopping on Monday, and was sharply criticized by local charities.
From the Herald Sun:
World Vision Australia chief Tim Costello said Hilton’s spree would have been enough to feed a Third World village.
“In World Vision terms, $5000 would ensure that a village of 2000 people in Africa or Asia would have clean water for the rest of their lives,” Mr Costello said.
Open Family social worker Les Twentyman said Hilton’s spree was disgraceful.
“It is quite obscene spending money like that. Some people are homeless and thousands of people a week are losing their jobs and it is quite obscene in some ways,” Mr Twentyman said.
Class act that she is, instead of acknowledging that yeah, that show of excess was maybe a little crass (and a far cry from her quasi-humanitarian work with a charity that provides water to drought-stricken areas) or matching the spree with a donation, she defended her behavior thusly:
“I’m in Australia, I think it’s important to help out, you know, the economy out here, everywhere in the world … And what’s wrong with doing a little shopping? It’s New Year’s, I need a New Year’s dress.”
If the alternative is that she goes naked tonight as the ball drops, I suppose we should all be thankful.
This is a post about David Mamet.
David Mamet?
What did I just say? David Mamet.
I know who the guy is, I have full use of, y’know, my hearing, thank you, I’m just saying, what about him?
Maybe you should shut the f*** up and listen.
Maybe, maybe you–
The purpose of this post is to note that one of David Mamet’s former NYU theater students, Nancy Balbirer, has written a book.
So we’re talking about this now.
This is what we’re talking about.
She wrote a book.
Very good.
I don’t suppose she has a lot of nice things to say about him.
You suppose correctly:
Continue reading ‘Always Be Castigating’
Comeback kid Mickey Rourke — who is not the same person as Mickey Rooney, I just learned — is generating all kinds of bad press for slamming Sean Penn as a “homophobe,” just ahead of the Academy’s release of the Oscar nominations. Sean Penn is likely to get a nod for his turn as openly gay politician Harvey Milk in Gus Van Sant’s new period flick Milk, while Mickey Rourke is eyeing the prize for his starring role in The Wrestler.
The dish:
After his December 23 appearance on David Letterman, Rourke told someone backstage that he was surprised that so many people seemed to think that Penn was his Oscar competition since “I’m not even sure he’ll get a nomination.”
On December 28, a Los Angeles entertainment honcho shared a text message with me that Rourke had sent him: “Look seans an old friend of mine and i didnt buy his performance at all—thought he did an average pretend acting like he was gay besides hes one of the most homophobic people i kno” [sic]
Now if he’s trying to make himself look better in comparison to his “old friend,” it ain’t working. But if he wants to sling homophobic mud, maybe he ought to explain this quote from last month (with video):
When pressed about his rumored romance with Marilyn Manson’s ex-Evan Rachel Wood (who incidentally plays Rourke’s lesbian daughter in the film), Rourke esoterically shoots back, “She’s a good friend, that’s it. And tell that f*ggot who wrote all that sh*t in the paper I’d like to break his f*cking legs.”
So eloquent, that one. I’m sure since the Academy is 100% straight, he’ll do fine.
I know it’s not cool to pick on retarded people and all, but sometimes when they’re famous, you don’t really have a choice.
Mariah Carey was recently asked about the meaning of the title of her newest album, E=MC^2. Her response (with commentary from Agent Bedhead)?
The diva/screen legend cheerfully explained that it meant “emancipation equals Mariah Carey times two.” Wrong, bozoette. That little 2 means the term is multiplied by itself, something you might have learned if you hadn’t spent fourth grade memorizing tunes from Josie and the Pussycats.
Indeed. So now science-education charities are pushing their glasses up their noses and protesting that idiots like her do more harm than good in the world. And they’re right, but you know if she even bothered to read newspapers in the first place, she’d be all “whatever, do YOU have your very own pink Malibu Beach House?”
The funny twist? Mimi at least pretends that education is important — for other people. In 1994 she founded Camp Mariah, which, according to her website, “focuses on expanding the educational and career options of New York City adolescents.”
Bonus: The website goes on to explain that the camp was “named after Mariah, obviously” (third graf). It’s sweet that she writes her own copy, don’t you think?
I hate Rachael Ray. There — I said it. Did you know that Google returns 161,000 website hits when you search for the words “I hate Rachael Ray”? (289,000 if you spell “Rachael” wrong like I did the first time…) My favorite results are here, here, and here.
You know how most people would really like to pummel Kelly Ripa and Katie Couric for being so damned perky and faux-cute, but we give them a pass because they were just born that way? Well, Rachel Ray is sorta like a wind-up version of that, and it’s okay to wish a butt-kicking on her because, well, she just deserves it.
Too much? Maybe.
The Seattle Post-Intelligencer is delivering today’s walloping of Rachael. Seems she, in all her cuteness, contributed a “pet friendly” holiday recipe to Modern Dog magazine, and it contains onions. Which are pretty damned dangerous to feed a dog.
The magazine has since zapped the recipe from its website, but the entire feature (verbatim, with poisonous doggy dinner) is still available in Ray’s own online universe. Along with a photo of Ray sharing said poison with her dog.
Rachael makes a big deal of promoting “pet friendly” recipes as a part of her evil, cute plot to take over the media universe once Oprah loses her golden touch. I just wish she weren’t also secretly bent on killing our pet pooches, PETA-style.
Here’s another “pet friendly” Rachael Ray recipe including 1 cup of milk, which can give some lactose-intolerant dogs a nasty case of diarrhea.
Real friendly, Rach. Reeeeeeal friendly.
Hat tip: Celebitchy
Celebritology stumbled across a belated Christmas present for us, a veritable goldmine of Deceiver fodder: Michael Lohan’s personal blog. Oh yes. (The music makes it NSFW; the content makes it NSFL.)
Everyone’s favorite celebrity parent has been blacklisted from issuing his slander in the tabloid pages, so he’s taken it to the streets. So far, posts include a defense of Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis and lots of biblical passages.
But let’s be frank about the site’s real purpose. Celebritology hits the mark:
Moving right along, it quickly becomes evident that Lohan has created this site as way to get out his messages without having to go through the pesky filter of the dread media. Or, more likely, because the New York Post was, like, so over posting his nasty-grams to Samantha Ronson that the former jailbird had no choice but to go solo. To that end, he’s posted a few items already that purport to “set the record straight.” Being a big fan of delusional, circular logic, I particularly admired this passage:
“After reviewing some of the comments on this blog and even others, let me say that this website is NOT about Lindsay or Samantha. I have no intention of disclosing any information or feelings I may have about either one of them unless it is in defense of what they or one of their ‘mouthpieces’ might say about me. If in fact, one of their ’sources’, so called ‘friends’ or ’spokespersons’ have something to say about me, then I guess we will just have to open up discussion on them as well.”
That post was filed in category “Lindsay Lohan.”
Is Long Island an irony-free zone? ‘Cause this shiz is promising.
Remember, folks: We only read Page Six so you don’t have to. Honest!
From yesterday:
Earlier this month, Page Six reported that Deutsch got caught fooling around with a married woman and that it prompted her husband to file for divorce. But now Deutsch, in “The Big Idea,” out next week from Hyperion, writes how important it is not to cat around.
“We’ve all heard the story. A guy marries his college sweetheart and she is the love of his life. She is completely devoted to him, and is willing to make every conceivable sacrifice to support his success. Hand in hand, they conquer the challenges of money, career and family,” Deutsch writes. “And then he leaves her. He walks out the door, saying he’s going to follow a new love. Don’t let this happen to you.”
Deutsch goes on: “No, I’m not giving marriage advice. I am, however, offering advice of the heart.”
A few weeks ago, hedge-fund manager Andrew Sandler – suspicious that his wife, Lisa, was cheating on him – hired a private eye to follow her. Sources told us the gumshoe snapped surveillance photos of Lisa kissing Deutsch. The evidence prompted Sandler to pull the plug on the marriage.
Deutsch’s flack insisted he’s not speaking with a forked tongue, saying what he wrote has no bearing on his own life. “It’s completely irrelevant. It’s not a personal thing at all,” the rep told us. “Donny is equating this to finding your passion in life, something you feel passion about.
I have a feeling Donny feels most “passionate” about selling books, not being a couples counselor. Just a hunch.
… and all through Deceiver
The bloggers took breaks from their Hypocrite Fever.
‘Cause Oversneer, Simon, and Holly as well
Were wildly entranced by an egg-noggy smell.
“Keep blogging? Or boozing?” they asked with a wink.
“The latter,” quipped Simon, as he tippled his drink.
“Our readers will wait for us,” Holly insisted.
“They won’t jump to Jossip, or Fark, or D-Listed.”
And I in my kerchief (whatever that is…)
Agreed, because Christmas should trump all this shizz.
But we’ll be back soon, hunting hypocrites again;
Here’s a round-up of fakers to hold you ’till then.
Merry Festiv-Kwanzaa-Christ-nakkah!
(Wishing you a joyous “whatever holiday doesn’t offend you.”)
Continue reading ‘‘Twas the Night Before Christmas …’
Praise be! That scene on The Hills in the Beverly Hills courtroom with the actor-slash-judge that I was wondering about? Wrapped up pretty much the way you’d hope and expect: as a sham.
According to Us Weekly, Spencer and Heidi’s personal biographers and chronic comma addicts:
Finally, in front of Deputy Commissioner, Donna Jones, Heidi proclaims, “I, Heidi, take thee Spencer to be my lawfully wedded husband for better or for worse for as long as we both shall live.” After a tense few seconds, Spencer pauses, and tells Montag, “I feel like we’re doing something sneaky and shady.” As Montag begins to cry, she says, “Of course I want my mom here.” Pratt responds, “I just want to give you the wedding of your dreams that you have been talking about for three years. I’ll deal with it It’s worth it to be with you the rest of my life. We’ll do it the way you want, I’m sorry, I love you so much.”
On the Hills after-show, Pratt and Montag appeared live in studio for the first time. Said Pratt: “Things are better since we didn’t legalize the wedding. Now I can live throughout 2009. They didn’t show the look of death in her [mom's] eyes on the episode!” Added Montag: “I want cakes and bridesmaids, two of them are standing right here,” referring to Holly Montag and Stephanie Pratt.
And so concluded Season Four of The Hills as well as this never-ending publicity stunt. (Was it really only a month ago that the roller-coaster ride and mockery of holy matrimony began? It seems like forever.)
And she is taking the appropriate action:
“Tara Reid has checked herself into Promises Treatment Center. We appreciate your respect to her and her family’s privacy at this time,” said the actress’s rep Jack Ketsoyan. No additional information was given regarding what Tara was being treated for.
“Her friends and family are supportive of her decision. She checked in herself – it was her decision,” said a friend.
I’m gonna go out on a limb and guess it’s for alcohol. Although not that long ago, Ms. Reid was all about how it was the media’s fault everyone thinks she’s a drunk:
“I don’t like going out every single night,” she tells OK!. “I like to hang with friends and eat and sit next to a fire — that to me is the best night.”…
“If I have a drink in my hand, it doesn’t make me an alcoholic. If I want a glass of wine, I want a glass of wine. I shouldn’t be afraid of it because of what the media might say. Anything you do, you’re screwed. That’s the lesson I’ve learned.”
You have to wonder if it took her this long to check into rehab because she didn’t want to admit the media was kinda sorta right.
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