This story, from the “Western Wisdom” blog, is a few years old. And sure, there’s nobody really famous in the story. But so what? I’m in a weird mood, and my e-mail inbox has become an endless source of amusement since we started this blog more than a year ago.

I’m not making any representations that this re-told conversation with a couple of PETA representatives ever actually happened.

Just that it’s entertaining.

And that it really should surprise no one.

Them: … I love my pets like I love my own children!

Me: What do you feed them?
Them: Mostly canned foods, like Alpo or Purina. They like the soft foods better than the dry, so that’s what I give them.

Me: So you’re saying you feed your pets meat?
Them: I guess so, that’s what they like.

Me: So then it’s okay to kill other animals for food?
Them: No, killing animals is cruel for any reason!

Me: But you just said you feed meat to your pets.
Them: –silence–

Me: It seems to me if you feed meat to your pets then you’re advocating the killing of animals for food.
Them: That’s different though!

Me: How so? You already said that killing animals for any reason is cruel.
Them: Umm, uhh, well you see, uhh.. dogs and cats are omnivorous and need meat in their diet.

Me: Actually most dogs and cats are carnivorous by nature and are forced omnivorous diets when domesticated, but you bring up a good point. Humans have always been omnivorous for all of recorded history, and you’re trying to force vegetarianism on people saying it’s ethical, while saying that it’s wrong to force vegetarianism on animals. Seems a little bit hypocritical don’t you think?
Them: It’s would be unethical to force animals to eat a diet un-natural to them!

Me: Isn’t that exactly what you’re trying to force on people though?
Them: Well, yes, but…

There’s more at the original source, but you get the idea. I’m officially now offering a $100 bounty for a photograph of any prominent PETA-supporting celebrity pet owner (excuse me… “pet guardian“) buying his or her precious animal food that’s, well, made from animals.

Let’s have some fun.

Hat tip: Loyal Deceiver tipsters Gen & Brian