As longtime Deceiver readers know, I am fully committed to vegetarianism. That’s right: I refuse to eat any animal that did not eat its vegetables. It’s a daily challenge, but so far I’ve been brave enough to stick to my principles. Which is why it’s so nice to be namechecked by Vegetarian Star:
Holly Won’t, The Oversneer, and Simon Scowl at Deceiver would have a ball with this one.
Remember Lake Bell, the actress we recently discovered was vegan? She talked about how she was in charge of vegan sweets during the holidays with her family and she went to Baby Cheeks, Sweetie Buns, Baby Cakes bakery in NY for all her vegan goodies?
We did some research in the archives and discovered she has a fish problem, or at least she had one last year at a party for her childhood friend Lyn Devon’s fashion show.
New York Mag caught up with her and asked her why the heck she was eating a salmon hors d’oeuvre if she was a vegan.
“It’s okay, I already came out about my fish-eating-ness to my closest vegan friend, Alicia Silverstone, and she already approves,” Bell said.
It’s hard to believe that Lake Bell and Alicia Silverstone were in the same room without the sheer star power blowing the roof off. I know that when I’m trying to decide what to have for dinner, I think, “What would Alicia do?” If she says Lake Bell isn’t a silly hypocrite for eating animals and yet claiming to be a vegetarian, then the rest of us should just get over our hangups about “words” and their alleged “meanings.” Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to have a few beers because I’m a teetotaller.
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I’m sorry, who is this chick?
I’m confessing my t-bone steak eatingness to all the vegans right now. I bet Alicia won’t mind.
Anyone know how to get a hold of Alicia? Boy do I have problems. There was that whole thing last weekend… well you know.
I eat fish, eggs, steak, cheese, and vegetables. Can I be a vegan too if I confess to a vegan? Do they get insurance discounts or something?
Well, if Alicia said it was okay, then it must be okay, right?
So vegans have confessional now? Manned by Silverstone? What, she absolves you off your carnivorous sins so it’s okay?
“Bless me, Alicia, for I have sinned…”
“You are forgiven”
“Do you want to know what I did?”
“This is vegan confession. My guess is you like to eat yummy, yummy animals.”
“Yeah…”
“S’okay, we all do it. Drink three bloody Mary’s and it won’t seem hypocritical to you.”
Or that’s how I imagine it goes
“oh its ok! i already told alicia”
really.. shut up.
Sorry if I annoy any of the regulars here, but as long as stories like this keep coming out, I am going to keep asking it until a ‘real’ vegan answers me.
Who the hell keeps telling these people that fish ISN’T meat? Does this go back to that ‘we only protect cute animals’ thing most animal rights folks tend to slip into?
“S’okay, we all do it. Drink three bloody Mary’s and it won’t seem hypocritical to you.”
Anyone else immediately think Izzard? :]
It reminds me of the commerical….I’m a veterinarian, I don’t eat meat.
Shell- you got me, I seemed to be unconsciously channeling his church of england bit. God, my boss needs to get a coffeemaker.
Scott F.- the problem is vegans are vegan for such different, different reasons and they make up rules based on their reason for giving up meat. People who are vegan for health reasons will often eat fish because it’s healthy, unlike red meat which apparently will kill you and your dog. Vegans who do it in a “animals have souls” kinda way will claim that fish don’t have as evolved of a nervous system, therefore making it ethical to eat them but not a cute little piggie.
Of course, that still means they aren’t vegans, but just avoid red meat, chicken and/or pork. Or, like the “vegetarian” I know, will “never eat meat” except or fish and BACON. Because, and I quote: “Bacon is soooo good and, like, they already killed the pig to make the chops and whatever”
Ah, Phoenix wins the thread!
Scott, go to the PETA website and ask, we are all dirty meat eaters here. lol
“Scott, go to the PETA website and ask, we are all dirty meat eaters here. lol”
Point taken bro, but frankly, I’d rather stick my junk in the garbage disposal than subject myself to that level of idiocy and moral relativism. I just keep thinking about the fish subject because my wife’s sister who claims to be a vegan eats fish. Of course this is the same chick that (in front of my wife’s entire family) rejected a $400 dollar leather coat in disgust, and then got pissed off when I pointed out (also in front of everyone) that the suede her shoes were made of didn’t grow on an f-ing plant.
I’d hit it. And Alicia too!
She looks like Amanda Peet. They’re all interchangeable aren’t they? Can’t really tell one from another anymore.
Vegetarian = someone who doesn’t eat meat. Some eat eggs and cheese, some don’t. There are some fishatarians who still for some reason claim to be vegetarians.
Vegan = someone who astains from ALL animal products. Vegans don’t eat eggs, cheese, yogurt, ice cream, butter, honey, or anything that originated from an animal, living or otherwise. They don’t wear wool, even if the donor sheep is still baa-baaing on some meadow. They don’t use beeswax candles.
I’m guessing there are many morons who want to seem holier and hipper than thou, so they claim to be “vegan” when they are really fishatarians or marginal vegetarians. Vegan just seems chicer and sexier to the Hollywood/Manhattan crowd I suppose.
*Thinks about steak for lunch.*
Scott F.-
I’m a ‘real’ vegan, and I don’t think I’m a morally relative one. I don’t eat or use any animal products, doesn’t matter if they came from something cute or not. I don’t know if animals have souls, I admit they’re not as evolved as us, I don’t think it’s hip to be vegan, I’m not holier than thou, I just want to be responsible for the least amount of pain I can be. I know it’s not possible to be 100% vegan, no one can be, unless you live like a hermit, but for every choice I can make, when there’s a vegan alternative, I’ll take it. I know a lot of vegans are self-righteous assholes, believe me, they annoy ‘real’ vegans too, but please don’t tar us all with the same brush. It’s not fair that all vegans get such a horrible reputation, when most of us just want to avoid doing harm. It would be nice if people could admit that when done correctly, that’s a laudable thing.
“Who the hell keeps telling these people that fish ISN’T meat? ”
The Catholic Church, probably.
“I’m a Level 4 vegan–I don’t eat anything that casts a shadow.”
Now, re-read that, excluding the crossed out line, and replace vegan with the religious denomination of your choice.
I think HeatherRadish probably hit it on the head… Catholics are behind everything.
However, I think I’ve heard it justified before because fish don’t have advanced/complex nervous systems like other mammels? PETA should recruit someone from a debate team sometime… inject at least a little logic.
You didn’t cross out a line. And that’s offensive, religion is based on things that can’t be proven or disproven, veganism is based on tangible things like pain. Why is it ok to mock vegans, make us sound ridiculous, but as soon as a vegan says something akin to ‘meat is murder’, ohhhh, hold on, not allowed? Surely that’s hypocritical, which I believe is the theme of this website.
Ashley, the issue here is not that people are mocking your lifestyle choice for the sake of mocking it. It’s the fact that eating meat has been shown, time and again, to be part of a healthy and balanced diet. Our ability to reason and recognize that yeah, it sucks to be the prey animal, does not change that we are predators, nor does it mean that as predators, we have no compassion or respect for life. Are you going to suggest a lion not eat zebra? I’m not going to get into the why’s of why a vegan lifestyle is horrible for you, as I have written about it on here enough already under other posts and it would be lost on you anyway. And this is coming from a former vegetarian whose health suffered greatly for two years because of it, despite eating all the “right things”.
Anyway, while I am not saying you are a douche, most vegans are. Why? Well, they do have a holier than thou attitude. The vast majority of them, especially the ones that support terrorists like PETA, are patting themselves on the back because they are not contributing to “pain”, yet they have no problem calling a fellow human being a savage for having a bacon sandwich, and supporting organizations that would see life saving medical research halted in the name of saving a lab rat. They don’t love animals, they hate people, and that sort of self loathing is douchery of the worst kind and more cruel than anything you can do to a sheep with a stun gun and a sharp knife.
A lot of vegans have little or no understanding of nature or how it works. Without people hunting deer and other wildlife (and I mean for food, with a license, and not just to have a tacky head over the fireplace), there would be ecological disaster because we cannot just remove ourselves from the food chain. Yet, they demonize responsible hunters who are in fact doing far more for animals by eating them than a vegan is doing by not eating them.
A lot of vegans are hypocritical, and this is why they are so often featured on this web site. This post is nothing, but if one professes to be a vegan, talks trash about those people who aren’t, but is then seen in leather boots or exiting a KFC, they need to be smacked in the mouth not only for being hypocrites, but for being ass clowns. If they were quietly avoiding animal products without all the preaching, and just happened to give in on a few things, it might not be an issue, but given the disgusting behavior and attitudes of most vegans, it is.
Schvwooom!
(That’s the sound of Rocko’s point, mach 5 and a mile over Ashley’s head.)
Maybe I used the wrong tag, anyway, the line to not read is “I don’t know if animals have souls, I admit they’re not as evolved as us,”.
who is this?
Chronic,
You say people aren’t mocking the lifestyle just for the sake of mocking, but that’s not true a lot of times. You say that you recognize it sucks to be the prey animal, and that you still respect life, etc., but then why do people make it all sooo lighthearted, like saying people for the eating of tasty animals, or ‘I’m gonna go eat a giant steak now’ in response to anything said by a vegan. That doesn’t sound like you feel bad that you ‘have’ to eat the animals, there’s no mention of doing it for your health in those kinds of statements, it just sounds like you think it’s funny. And for every point you make against veganism, one can be made for it, so it’s a neverending cycle. Even mainstream science recognizes that a vegan diet can be extremely healthy. Deer overpopulation is a myth http://www.idausa.org/facts/hunting.html This could go on and on, but it serves no purpose, the same way you said to me that listing all of the reasons veganism is unhealthy would mean nothing to me. People take facts and fit them to their belief systems, vegan or not. The whole argument about us being predators, and how it’s all evolution, etc., is still morally relative. Handicapped people serve no evolutionary purpose, they’re technically a drain on resources, but because of their species, they’re not considered prey. People say animals are less important than people because they’re more intelligent, and we shouldn’t feel guilty about killing them because they’re not aware enough to know what’s happening, but we don’t kill children. Many animals have the intelligence of toddlers, but again, because of species, they’re just prey. This is the most circular argument in the world, because you don’t want to believe that what I say might have a slight bit of truth, and the same goes for me towards what you say. I don’t want to kill anything, that’s why I’m vegan….I don’t think that’s mockable, and I also don’t think I’m responsible for all the douchebaggery comitted by some other vegans, yet we’re all lumped together as one big laughable freakshow.
Minnow, if I missed the point, could you explain it to me?
Ashley,
The statements made are not meant to be insensitive toward animals, but rather, dismissive of vegan preachers. Do you expect people to cry over their steaks to show compassion for animals? Do you expect us to mourn the passing of the Christmas goose? Get serious. We don’t have to prove to anyone that we are compassionate toward animals. I worked with animals for five years, which is a lot more than a lot of these idiots can claim, I own two dogs that hardly know they are dogs, but even if I hadn’t, it’s nothing that needs proving because we are not doing anything wrong by eating what we are meant to eat. There is nothing to feel guilty about.
We could go back and forth forever, especially given that PETA propaganda lies about the meat industry more often than not, as well as the benefits of a vegan diet. Again, it’s not so beneficial, especially if you have to take supplements, and long term vegans suffer a host of health issues, which is what any credible doctor will tell you. If ever you drive around Lake Travis in Austin, you will get a first hand look as to why deer overpopulation is not a myth, and this is the story in most areas where deer hunting is popular. Furthermore, venison is good for you, even better than beef, and the populations are not endangered at all. The same goes for most animals that are hunted. I am a native of Florida, and grew up at a time when alligators were endangered. They had a population boom and without those hunters out there each year killing their quota, not only would we miss out on nutritious alligator meat, but a lot more joggers would disappear every year.
Animals are not human. To compare them to the handicapped or the otherwise evolutionary unfit just shows how pathetic this argument is. Sorry, Ashley, it doesn’t hold water. We don’t generally eat the handicapped or children to maintain a healthy diet.
I love animals. I have worked with a lot of them, domestic and otherwise. I am against cruelty to animals just like the majority of normal people are. I have also raised hogs for slaughter, and they had good lives and were treated with respect by not being wasted once they were killed for our consumption. I don’t feel that animals are less important due to their intelligence or lack thereof, but a human life is more important to me than an animal’s life because I am human too.
Maybe you aren’t a douche-vegan or a vege-nazi, but the people out there who are make the whole of you look bad. Perhaps instead of trying to convince meat eaters that you are somehow noble for not using animal products, you should work toward changing the attitudes of people who make the rest of the vege-whatevers look like idiots. Most of these activists spout nothing more than ignorance about nature and animals as a whole, have little respect for their own species, and do act like evangelists, as Scott F. pointed out. And that is what’s mockable.
EDIT on my last post. That should read Rocko, not Scott F. I had Scott F. on the brain when I wrote it.
“…religion is based on things that can’t be proven or disproven, veganism is based on tangible things like pain…
That right there folks is precisely why vegans have given themselves such a bad public image.
Keep talking Ashley, I’m totally sure you’re swaying the masses.
I believe the Shaolin “warrior” Monks are Buddhists and therefore basically vegans right? I bet no one would call them douches. I would because I’m huge and have a PHD in ass kicking from Oakton Community College. It came with a wallet sized badge, and multicolored arm patch. Did I get scammed? Anyway, maybe it’s just the Western vegans that are a** wipes?
How is that statement deserving of a bad public image? Which bit even? And I really love how, on a site BASED on hypocrisy, a vegan isn’t allowed to speak their piece, defend their opinion, if they do it’s considered trying to sway the masses, but people can say anything they want against vegans. I haven’t said anything rude or inflammatory, and I can’t even get a polite answer to my question?
Ashley, you’re not responsible for the actions of other vegans. However, I disagree with your choices. I don’t think there is anything “laudable” in not eating meat or anything made from animal products.
“Deer overpopulation is a myth”
::coughs:: Bullshit! Sorry, wow, still getting over this bronchitis.
Ashley, you live in a major city don’t you? It’s generally urbanites that can’t seem to grasp the fact that there IS a food chain and we’ve ALREADY screwed it up, so humans are responsible for picking up the pieces. It’s really simple to understand – we’ve killed off the predator animals because they posed a threat to our safety (wolves, coyotes, mountain lions, ect.), and frankly, cars alone don’t kill enough prey animals to make up the gap.
You really wanna convince people that we don’t have a deer overpopulation problem? Try searching Google for ‘Brown County Indiana Deer Hunting’. I myself have participated in quite a few population thinning hunts. Why? Because the deer were STARVING TO DEATH and dying of horrible diseases. A few years ago it got so bad we weren’t supposed to eat anything we killed because of the rampant diseases caused by malnourishment. You can believe all the vegan internet data you want, but I can e-mail you digital camera pictures of the emaciated and disease-ridden corpses of those we thinned out that year – it’s pretty conclusive.
Now, that brings me to my second point: you are NOT more moral, caring, loving, or protective of animals than meat eaters. Sorry, you just aren’t. The fact you think you are is what instinctively pisses us off and makes us defensive. Your philosophy would have left the deer I just mentioned to die slowly and painfully of disease and starvation because killing is ‘wrong’. That’s the problem with vegans and animal right’s types, they seem to stop developing emotionally at about 6 years old, when moral arguments are all black and white, right and wrong, NO MATTER WHAT.
Most people manage to progress as they get older along these lines:
6 years old: Killing is WRONG! And icky I might add!
16 years old: Killing is wrong, but sometimes you have to feed your family.
26 years old: Killing isn’t wrong. Killing is a fact of nature, and our moral equivalency will never pause or stop the immutable laws of the universe that we must siphon biological energy from one being to us in order to survive. Be it a plant, animal, or freaking plankton, SOMETHING will die to keep us alive. The argument that killing animals is worse than killing plants is like saying it’s better to kill 6 people than 20. You’re still a killer, so get over yourself.
It’s called moral relativism, and you’re right when you say it’s a tired and circular argument. You’re no more ‘ethical’ than the rest of us though, you just want to act like you are.
Rocko, then we disagree.
Scott F, first of all, I grew up in Minot, ND, a major city of around 30,000 people, and half of my time was spent on my grandparent’s farm. Yea, I’m a huge urbanite. Second, I’ve been around hunting, my dad hunted, his friends, all of my family, etc. I’ve been around enough hunters to know that not all of them, in fact, very few of them, do it for the deer’s benefit. My dad used to rewind hunting videos just to see the moment of impact(yes, I know, big freudian arrow pointing out the reasons I don’t want to kill things) I’m not saying none do, but to make it sound like a mission of peace is misleading. If deer overpopulation is true, fine, convince me of it, I’m not a stupid person, and I wouldn’t ignore facts, despite what you might believe. Also, you’re wrong to say I would let animals starve to death because all killing is wrong. That’s wrong and it’s a shitty thing to say about someone you don’t know. I haven’t gone all vegan preachy, calling you a murderer, so don’t accuse me of being some heartless naive person. I would never allow anything to suffer pain if I could prevent it, even if that meant killing it. Do you assume that no vegans have ever had a pet put to sleep? Seriously, I’ve never met many vegans personally, probably like 6, so I don’t know if most of them are douchebags or not, but obviously a lot of them must be, because the picture you seem to have in your head of them is pretty nasty. When did I ever say I was better than you? When did I say that all killing is wrong? What I said is that if I have a choice, I will choose the least violent one. I know that I’m not going to die or suffer without animal products, so I don’t use them. The thing that’s really pissing me off is that you’re willing to pin me with moral relativism, but not yourself.
“…religion is based on things that can’t be proven or disproven, veganism is based on tangible things like pain…”
Ashley, do you really want to go at this? Can you promise to argue on topic and not go wandering off topic from deer population to crippled children to turtle IQ’s and the big bad meanies on board here?
Okay… here we go:
First off, your statement was incredibly pompous. “My vegan philosophy is soooo much more valid than any religion on the face of the earth.” Really? The more you speak here dear, the more zealous you sound.
Secondly, proof isn’t a concrete term; what satisfies one person completely may leave another still scratching their head, especially in the metaphysical matters. I may be skeptical that the Virgin Mary goes around leaving her likeness on peices of toast, but what’s important is that other people believe it wholeheartedly. How silly of you to value the peace you get from veganism over and above the peace someone attains by religious practice. They are the same exact experience Ashley.
Third: No, we can’t drag any one version of God before a court of law and document his/her existence. And yet since the dawn of civilization humans have felt the need to pay homage to spiritual forces. This need or drive has been present in every culture that has ever existed; we have idols, cave paintings, megaliths, and organized burials going back long, long, long before Moses, Jesus or Mohammed ever tickled their toes in desert sand. Religion isn’t some nasty Judeo-Christian conspiracy, dear. The drive to worship is embedded in our DNA.
Fourthly, millions of people turn to religion as relief from pain. Your anthropomorphized animals aren’t the only beings to experience pain. Humans feel pain too, both physical and emotional. For many, religion offers surcease from suffering. Buddhism is founded on the principal of ending pain. Judiasm sprang up from the extreme constraints of slavery. Islam and Christianity were created by minority groups as an answer to hedonistic societal trends. They all have one grand thing in common: people in pain.
Ultimately, what your simple statement did was to belittle millions of people over thousands of generations in a weak attempt to bolster your personal confidence in your own peculiar eating habits.
What’s really tacky is that you desparage systems founded on personal humility in an effort to plump your own breast. Way to go peaches, need any help removing that foot?
Minnow,
You really are a self-satisfied bully. Truly. You’ve set it up so that anything I say will be construed as zealous, offensive, immature, etc. How can you say I was belittling, when you just called me ‘peaches’ and ‘dear’? So apparently hypocrisy only bothers you when it’s about something you disagree with? And by the way, I was not having a go at religion, I was not belittling it, I have no problem with religion, my mother is a Methodist minister, I have a Hebrew tattoo, our house is filled with Buddhas and Hindu ephemera, and I often get desires to attend Mass. I think religion is beautiful in a lot of ways, I also think it can be horrible, i.e. Palestine and Israel, but I have never belittled it. What I said is that it can’t be proven or disproven, whereas pain is not metaphysical, pain is biological, and can be witnessed and scientifically proven. You cannot assume you know everything about someone’s views on religion based on one sentence. Also, you say that the ‘peace’ I get from veganism is the same experience that religious people get from said religions. That would mean veganism and religion are equal. But you then go on to say that veganism is peculiar, and you’ve done essentially nothing but belittle me since I first posted, even though I’ve done nothing to you, and said nothing against you, or your lifestyle choices. You seem to think that veganism is done for ego, to make me feel good about myself. That’s so wrong. I do it because it’s the only thing I’m comfortable with. My ego doesn’t factor into it. Yours on the other hand seems nicely inflated, as you’re clearly comfortable making sweeping statements about strangers. Don’t talk about how humans feel pain as much as animals, and then cause it in other people. It’s rude.
Ashley, why do you have a Hebrew tattoo? What does it mean? Are you Jewish?
And let’s not blame religion for Israel and Palestine. There’s more going on there than religion, a lot more.
Oh Ashley, this is tiresome.
Let us review:
In comment number 24, I humorously noted that you missed the point of Rocko’s comment.
You challenged me in comment 27. In response, I briefly quoted your response to Rocko in comment #28 as proof that you missed the point. I stated that the comment was sadly typical of today’s prominent vegans. I also pointed out that you weren’t being quite as persuasive as you seemed to think.
Then, at your request in comment #34, I detailed why your statement was ill informed and historically inaccurate. I never challenged your lifestyle, your habits, your ethics, your religious background, or your personality.
I addressed your comment, not you.
In return, you chatter exhaustively, flittering across multiple topics as if factoids equate with philosophical depth. You detail your life history and body art as if they were a personal get-out-of-jail card, that nothing you write here is insulting or inaccurate.
You accuse commenters here of censorship, hypocrisy, presumption, and bully tactics.
Can’t you taste the wonderful irony in that?
Alas, now I’ve trounced on the joke. It’s never as funny when you have to spell it out.
BTW, I called you peaches because you argue like an 8 year old.
There, now I’ve officially insulted you. Shame on me.
Oh for the love of all things holy…
First of all, there was nothing historically inaccurate about my statement….I said religion cannot be proven or disproven, there’s no history in that! You alone extrapolated some huge insult to religion from that one sentence, and when you then called me out on it, you were ‘addressing’ me, not the comment, because it was a comment I didn’t make. I wouldn’t have to use a ‘get out jail free card’ if you didn’t misconstrue everything I say. And yes I can taste the irony, but it has nothing to do with me, because I’m not being a bully or a hypocrite. Tiresome is definitely the word for this, and so as not to exhaust my vegan, nutrient deprived body, I’m giving up, leaving you to further your feeling of smugness, secure in the knowledge that you defeated yet another silly vegan with your acerbic wit, the kind that apparently would defeat all the 8 year olds you’d have no problem in arguing with. Seriously though, no offense was ever intended, whether it be toward religion or meat-eaters…I’m a nice person, maybe naive, maybe idealistic, but I’m nice, despite what my eating choices apparently say about me.
“And I really love how, on a site BASED on hypocrisy, a vegan isn’t allowed to speak their piece, defend their opinion, if they do it’s considered trying to sway the masses, but people can say anything they want against vegans.” -Ashley
Who says you aren’t allowed to speak your piece? I am not aware of any comments you have made being censored or left unposted by those who run this site.
No one has stated that you are not allowed to defend your position on the matter, either.
Just because most everyone on here is in total disagreement with what you are saying does not mean that you are being bullied, personally insulted, or censored. I fail to see where there is any hypocrisy involved.
Quite frankly, I think you are looking to be offended.
Ashley, don’t tell any Jews that you have a Hebrew tattoo! Jewish people can’t be buried in consecrated ground if they have marked their bodies in any way. To tattoo Hebrew characters on your flesh is basically blasphemy to some people. Just like eating meat is basically blasphemy to others. It is impossible for any human to get through life without ever offending others, no matter how hard we try not to ‘harm’ any plant, animal, mineral or human. So, regardless of what side of the argument we’re on, we’re wrong. But we are also right. And the long and short of it is that differences of opinion are what make us what we are: individuals.
Don’t use animal products? AWESOME. Don’t preach, though.
Love a good steak? AWESOME. Don’t preach, though.
Actually, religion can be proven. Religion is a concept that actually exists. It is the beliefs of the religious that cannot be proven or disproven.
So no BFFsies?
I’ll still be your BFF, Minnow. Want to go get a burger and milkshake later? We could say a Native American prayer of thanks to the cow before we eat or something. Or just call and get Alicia Silverstone’s blessing.
Can I get the Filet o’ Fish? Since I’m vegetarian and all…
Minnow, MC, you two are terrible.
Somehow my favorite exchange from ‘Notting Hill’ comes to mind:
Keziah: No thanks, I’m a fruitarian.
Max: I didn’t realize that.
William: And, ahm: what exactly is a fruitarian?
Keziah: We believe that fruits and vegetables have feeling so we think cooking is cruel. We only eat things that have actually fallen off a tree or bush – that are, in fact, dead already.
William: Right. Right. Interesting stuff. So, these carrots…
Keziah: Have been murdered, yes.
Hey Rocko, you hush now buddy boy.
I’m still picking shrapnel out of my keister over your comment, Mr. Sir.
Sheesh, all I said was schvwoom and suddenly I’m chin deep in someone’s longwinded ethos.
You owe me a beer.
Minnow took one for the team, man. And with a name like Minnow, it was especially difficult because Alicia approves of the eating of seafood and when Alicia approves, then it’s okay.
McMom, that is hilarious, and I may need to watch “Notting Hill” now, even though I can’t stand whatsherface.