Eight contenders remain standing in the Hollywood regional, and seven of them are women — all eight if you count Tom Cruise.
They have one thing in common: Nobody wants to advance to the “Snark Sixteen.” (Really! Their publicists are begging you not to vote for them.)
Are you ready to pick the phoniest fakers in Tinseltown? All four polls are just one click away! To review their tournament résumés from Round 1 and reminisce about who they defeated, just click on these pictures:
Imagine the potential matchups in the Snark Sixteen, bracketologists. Half of these all-talk-no-walk stars will go back to pilates class and mango smoothies. The other half will have to do this all over again next week.
Will it be Paris “See you at the debate, bitches” Hilton against Tom “Dianetics” Cruise in the next round? Could we see Gwyneth “Goopy GOOP” Paltrow squaring off against Victoria “My underwear is made of fur” Beckham?
We’re getting to the point where the seeding doesn’t really matter. Anyone could send anyone else packing. It all depends on your mood, your sense of fair play, and your thirst for petty vengeance.
I’m so excited. And I just can’t hide it. I’m about to lose control and I think I like it.
REMINDER: We’re giving away more prizes this week. Leave a comment below (with a valid e-mail address) telling everyone how you voted and why, and you could win some cool stuff. And you can always click here for the most up-to-date brackets.
These polls will be open for 24 hours, and updated Brackets will be posted tomorrow. That’s when we let you have a crack at the Washington, DC regional — the “Politicos” bracket.
Round 2 (Stars & Starlets): Who's the bigger hypocrite?
- Paris Hilton (1) (58%)
- Jennifer Aniston (9) (42%)
Loading ...Round 2 (Stars & Starlets): Who's the bigger hypocrite?
- Tom Cruise (5) (57%)
- Katherine Heigl (13) (43%)
Loading ...Round 2 (Stars & Starlets): Who's the bigger hypocrite?
- Gwyneth Paltrow (3) (53%)
- Madonna (11) (47%)
Loading ...Round 2 (Stars & Starlets): Who's the bigger hypocrite?
- Lindsay Lohan (7) (55%)
- Victoria Beckham (2) (45%)
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Here’s for my votes on this:
Hilton Vs. Aniston: My vote goes to Paris Hilton. Jennifer Aniston is the ultimate “Has Been”; has been on “Friends” and was the wife of Brad Pitt. On the other side, we never saw her vagina or enduring her antics. We never saw getting her arrested for D.U.I. neither.
Tom Cruise Vs. Katherine Heigl: Tom Cruise is a Cult leader. Can’t be more hypocrite than that. He got my vote.
Gwyneth Paltrow Vs. Madonna: We can’t compare this. Gwyneth Paltrow is you average celebrity nut. She’s a vegan and got an over inflated ego. Madonna is the “Oh my Gawd she’s an ALIEN!”-Type of crazy. Just like Tom Cruise, she’s a leader for her own Sect, she forces her ex husband to keep brainwashing their children when on his guard and she adopted an African child just like someone buy a new jacket. If we add on this that she can’t act and the fact that she hasn’t produced anything original by herself since “Like a Virgin”, it makes her a monument for my vote.
Lohan Vs. Victoria? Lohan please!
I think I voted for the top seed in every match-up – they just seemed like the real “winners” in each case.
I voted:
Jennifer Aniston, because she annoys me so much more than Paris Hilton. I’m tired of hearing about Brad Pitt. Get some new material lady!
Tom Cruise, because of the whole scientology thing that doesnt recognize real medical conditions as illnesses. I’m all for religious freedom, but putting people’s lives at risk like that is not cool. Also, Katie doesn’t look as happy as she used to.
Madonna, just because. Somehow, Paltrow doesn’t really do anything for me, even though I know other people hate her.
LiLo, because I suspect her lesbian relationship to be a fake. She’s got pretty much no career at this point (when was the last time she made a movie?) and the only reason anyone cares about her is because she’s openly dating another girl. Which is kept conveniently in the public’s face due to the fact they have so many epic fights in public. It smells staged to me.
Wow, 50% each way in every one except Cruise, with 51%. Close calls! But i went for Aniston, Cruise, Madonna and Beckham, it was close calls tho!
Aniston (she wants her privacy – yeh right)
Cruise (and that horrid cult he belongs too)
Paltrow (a phony,clueless snob)
Lohan (The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree – the Lohans are going to dominate)
Wow…when I voted, they were all at 50/50, except Tom who was winning 51/49.
So why did I vote as I did?
Paris: Because she has too many pets and not enough brains. She hoards animals like Angelina hoards kids.
Tom Cruise: Scientology. What else? That’s more dangerous than a bad self-absorbed actress…she’s just hurting herself, Tommy Boy is complicit in hurting many.
Madonna: Mainly because of the cult angle, but also because she can’t seem to get that you don’t adopt children from a poor country, promise to help the people, and then don’t.
Lindsay: Because Posh is basically harmless.
Aniston – Would anybody anywhere on this planet actually take Paris Hilton seriously?
Cruise – “Dad! Tom Cruise won’t come out of the closet!”
Madonna – Where to start…..?
Beckham – Would be irrelevant to the planet if it weren’t for her husband.
This is how I voted:
Hilton, cause at least Aniston was/is an actor where as Hilton is a wannabe who likes to take animals along as accessories instead of pets. Let’s not forget the fact that she was given an award for having animals.
Cruise by far over Heigel. He was a great actor in the 80’s and 90’s and then started to annoy me over the whole preaching to everyone and telling us how to live. Even though Heigel is annoying, he has been annoying me much longer – let’s not forget the couch jumping on Oprah bit.
Madonna for me. Touch choice for the BFF’s. Again, she got rich off of us measly people and I use to love her in the 80’s before she went psycho. They both have annoying British accents but she has been far more annoying that Paltrow.
Lohan all the way. Everyone in that family is deceiver worthy. VB has not been in the news lately with her yelling and crying crap. This chick is just down right crazy. VB is just annoying, but at least she married a hottie.
Aniston
Cruise
Paltrow
Lohan
Aniston: I hate Paris Hilton. While I do not hate Jennifer so much as I am annoyed by her, the constant talk of her divorce and one day saying she will always love Brad, while claiming she’s completely over him the next paired with her using him as a springboard for more self promotion is just tiring.
Cruise: Scientology is little more than a money grab industry aimed at people who have no minds of their own. While Heigl is an ass clown extraordinaire, she will vanish into obscurity thanks to her diva ways, while Cruise will be forever seared into our brains.
Paltrow: Madonna is full of the crazy, but she hasn’t denied the crazy to the extent that Paltrow has denied the pretentiousness and snobbery despite it being GOOPed at us all. Also, Madonna is more or less true to herself, while Paltrow is a vegetarian/vegan when it suits her.
Lohan: Posh is at least somewhat likable sometimes, and I have mixed feelings about her in general. Lindsay is a blatant hypocrite.
At the time of my vote: Vadge v Fish Sticky is at a 50/50 (Go Team GOOPY face!)
& Blohan v Posh is 50/50 <- This one made me think before voting too. I was going to say Linds, but after the Twitter exposure… I really can’t be part of her trying to find way to stay “in the news.” Well, that and I think Posh hides hypocrisy in her space ship.
Two easy votes this round: Cruise the Crazii and Parasite Hilton. I’m waiting for their matchup! Two senseless halfwits destroyed by their own ego and enablers.
Aniston- At least Paris Hilton has the general idea that she’s famous for being trashy and doesn’t pretend to be some still-relevant I’m-really-just-a-normal-girl-who-is-totally-over-being-married-to-Brad-Pitt.
Heigl- I can’t stand actresses who pretend to be healthy, well-rounded, all-around nice girl when they’re really just snarky bitches lighting up a smoke like the rest of us. Tom Cruise might belong to a dangerous cult, but he doesn’t try to hide it; that makes him a crazy dumbshit with too much influence, not necessarily a major hypocrite.
Madonna- Gwyneth is annoying, but Madonna is just too much.
Beckham- I like how she’s promoting herself as some kind of “role-model”. And that’s not even getting into the whole fur thing.
I’m not sure if anyone in the list has two brain cells to rub together. I think I chose mostly based on experience at being a hypocrite: Paris, Tom, Madonna, and Victoria.
I went upset city all the way. I could take or leave three of those matchups, but Ciccone’s fake accent is going to get my vote each time.
Lohan, especially after her meltdown this weekend.
Hilton
Cruise
Paltrow
Lohan
My vote can best be summarized on one word for each celebrity.
Vapid
Cult
Apple
Lohan
Somebody write a haiku!
Aniston- “I vont to be left alone, but first let me say…”
Cruise- Little man, Big cult
Paltrow- “Let them eat cake, and there’s a nice little pastry shop along the chans de lise…”
Lohan- I keep waiting for Lindsay’s english accented twin to show up and reunite Michael & Dina.
I’m just sad that Beyonce isn’t here to think this is all about her.
– Paris–because even though she’s too stupid to be a hypocrite, I want Aniston off this site.
– Cruise–because I still don’t know who Heigl is.
– Madonna and Lohan. It was almost too close to call.
Paris, Tom, Gwyneth, and Lyndsay….Put them all in one room, and the egos alone would blow the walls out…That is if you could find a room with doors big enough to get their big heads in first…This round was still pretty simple…the next one is where things get really dicey..
I voted for the top seeds. I know “Party Line” but what the hell.
I voted for:
1) Hilton – An idiot thinking she can fool us all into believing that she’s really a lot more intelligent than she makes out. Deceiver gold.
2) Heigl – Stop pretending to be a good role model and suck on another cigarette.
3) Madonna – I don’t have to explain this one!
4) Lohan – Can’t. Stand. Her.
Can’t wait to vote in the category with Perez Hilton in it – he’s going down!!
Paris, Tom, Gwenyth or however you spell it, I’m not scrolling all the way back up there, and Vickie “The Bug” Beckham.
Did you see whatserface, Tom’s wife with hair extensions? She looks good and I usually think she looks like a sad doughy eyed beagle.
Yeah, I went top seeds as well. Paris Hilton wouldn’t know what to do with doing what she says (namely after telling Larry King she’s turned her life around). Tom Cruise needs no explanation. I had to go with Gwyneth Paltrow, just because she’s so over-the-top blatant about what she does, even though I think Madonna is scarier. Beckham and Lohan were also close, but Lindsay just seems dangerous whereas Posh is hypocritical and yet still taken seriously by some.
Hilton for the PETA thing, Heigl for telling us to conserve while flying to Earth Day rallies in private jets, Madonna for being a controlling jealous bitch, and Beckham for the fur flap.
Paris
Cruise
Paltrow
LiLo
After writing down my picks I realized that I had picked the cutest girl in each match.
Hilton vs. Aniston
-Hilton because I’m fairly certain she’s managed to deceive even herself.
Cruise vs. Heigl
-Cruise is far more entertaining as a real life character. Heigl can’t even pretend to be as interesting.
Madonna vs. Paltrow
-Tough. Real tough. Paltrow for her willingness to force her craziness onto the world via her web site whereas Madonna keeps it to herself.
Lohan vs. Beckham
-I pick Beckham. She’s transcontinental.
A couple of tough calls, but I went with:
Jen, Tom, Gywn, and Lindsay.
But I can smell an upset for Madonna. Her matchup with Paltrow is a good one because they both have that Anglophilia thing. Now if this was a physical fight, obviously Madonna would crush Paltrow with one roid-ed bicep. But I can avoid Madonna – people won’t stop talking about GOOP.
Hilton, Cruise, Paltrow, and Lohan.
The only one I feel really strongly about is Cruise, as I despise Scientology. The rest won simply for being more douchey than their competition.
Paris – dead dogs, sex video, claims to want to save the world with charity work but can’t be bothered to stop partying.
Tom – Girlfriend is just creepy
Madonna – She is just a horrible human being. Only a tiny bit more horrible than Gwyneth.
Lindsay – I guess it’s wrong to pick on meth addicted has been actresses who like to cut themselves. No, wait, it isn’t. Hey, Lindsay. Find a rehab that works with people with co-occurring disorders. Hopefully that will get you fixed up.
Hilton, Heigl, Paltrow, and Lohan : these just had the best combined sound.
Hilton, Heigl, Paltrow and Lohan. Maybe just because I hate them most…
Tom is insane, so he shouldn’t count as purposely being deceitful. Jennifer is just another bitter ex, and I’m entirely sure the continuous break-up talk is her doing. Madonna has alwyas been a fickle loudmouth, and does anyone ever take Beckham seriously?
Aniston, Cruise, Paltrow and Beckham. Most conspicuous and most annoying, in pretty much each bracket.
I had to go with Madonna over the goopy girl. Madonna is all about winning, and I really think she would kick some goopy a** if she didn’t win.
It was easy to choose Paris Hilton over Jennifer Aniston. Anniston, love her or hate her, at least has success in her career and it wasn’t entirely her fault she was jilted… tho it is her fault she keeps talking about it when asked. Hilton is just a waste of space, accomplished nothing.
HAGel versus Cruise? No contest. Cruise all the way.
Madonna and Paltrow… that was tough. I went with Madonna because she’s a control freak with her kids.
Lohan received my vote over Posh. While Posh does strange stuff, she’s at least somewhat responsible. Lohan trashes her career and takes no accountability for her actions.
Paris Hilton: Because I don’t remember that JA ever explicitly said she wanted to be a “role model” and then went on to a lifestyle of animal endangerment, complete lack of regard for other people, Olympic-level partying, and extensive use of illegal drugs…
Tom Cruise: Because Scientology is dangerous, and any and all non-celebrities who get involved become slaves to the cult. To be honest, though, what bothers me even more is the fact that he doesn’t seem to care about his two older kids anywhere near as much as precious Suri.
Gwyneth Paltrow: This one was especially tough, because she and Madonna are very similar in many of their hypocrisies, particularly the whole “It’s so hard to balance work and motherhood… what with my team of nannies and housekeepers” thing. However, GOOP and the vegetarianism/animal rights hypocrisies pushed me just over the line to Gwynnie.
Posh Spice: Because honestly, I can’t help but think there might be some mental health issues behind LiLo’s inconsistencies, but Posh is more the “intentional” kind of crazy.
Paris Hilton: Because I don’t remember that JA ever explicitly said she wanted to be a “role model” and then went on to a lifestyle of animal endangerment, complete lack of regard for other people, Olympic-level partying, and extensive use of illegal drugs…
Tom Cruise: Because Scientology is dangerous, and any and all non-celebrities who get involved become slaves to the cult. To be honest, though, what bothers me even more is the fact that he doesn’t seem to care about his two older kids anywhere near as much as precious Suri.
Gwyneth Paltrow: This one was especially tough, because she and Madonna are very similar in many of their hypocrisies, particularly the whole “It’s so hard to balance work and motherhood… what with my team of nannies and housekeepers” thing. However, GOOP and the vegetarianism/animal rights hypocrisies pushed me just over the line to Gwynnie.
Posh Spice: Because honestly, I can’t help but think there might be some mental health issues behind LiLo’s inconsistencies, but Posh is more the “intentional” kind of crazy.
Hilton. Cruise. Madonna. Beckham.
I’m amazed the voting is this close. This is gonna be interesting.
Hilton, Cruise, Madonna, and Lohan. Paris is famous for no reason, treats animals like fashion accessories, and is a general twit. Cruise for the crazy cult, Madonna for the same, and Lohan because Posh just doesn’t seem relevant enough to warrant the attention.
Dang, everybody I voted for is losing except for La Lohan.
I’m not certain if I’m fulfilling either the letter or the spirit of the law in this competition. I just voted for the most outspoken person who annoys me the most. In most cases, said person is not really a hypocrite & is actually sincerely & earnestly annoying.
I voted for Aniston over Hilton, since Hilton doesn’t seem to take herself as seriously as Aniston & doesn’t stridently tell the rest of us proles what to think.
Conversely, I voted for Heigl over Cruise since everybody is picking on Cruise, so he seems to be an underdog right now.
It was a tie between Paltrow & Madonna. Perhaps I’m projecting, but since I can’t take Detroit whore girl Madonna seriously, I’m assuming she doesn’t take herself seriously, either, so I voted for Paltrow as the most pompous blowhard.
Lastly, I voted for Lohan over Beckham, since I haven’t heard anything about the latter & no news is good news.
I am feeling articulated out here so breakdown is
Jennifer Aniston
Tom Cruise
Madonna
Lindsay Lohan
There is so much “I’d hit it factor” here…I think viagra is called for.
Jrod!! Viagra?? You?? I don’t believe it.
Jennifer Aniston – because she needs to get over being over Brad.
Kathryn Heigl – it was a tough choice. Tom Cruise is a freak more than a hypocrite (but not by much).
Madonna and Spice Beckham to round out the list. no reasons there, just felt like it.
yeah, I almost wish I could take back my Tom Cruise vote. But I hate him so much, I don’t care.
But to be fair, Seth took my part in the movie knocked up, so I have a soft spot for KH…
Aniston………because she atleast at one point in her life HAD a semi real career but continues to derail herself deliberately. Paris Hilton has nothing but Mommy and Daddy’s money and a trust fund.
Kathryn Heigl….because her arrogance is collosal.
Madonna……another played out cliche.
Poshie………she’s old enough to know better.
Aniston because she really needs to shut up about Brad. Or people need to stop asking her questions about it. But then she needs to stop answering those questions.
Heigl because she’s just been on a higher level than Cruise lately.
Madonna over Paltrow because she is clearly not all her public image would lead you to believe she is. I always figured Paltrow was a hippie. Never trust a hippie.
Beckham because she is a star, Lohan is a starlet.
Not to be a jerk, but it seems to me by the comments and the voting trends that most people are voting on who they hate the most, not who is the biggest hypocrite. I wouldn’t want to be in the same room with any of these souless shells of human flesh, but when it comes down to it, I catorgize everyone into several catagories and voted so appropriately
Hypocrites
Grade A Hypocrites
-Katherine Heigal
-Gwyneth Paltrow
-Victoria Beckham
Bat-Shit Crazy
-Tom Cruise
-Madonna
-Lindsay Lohan
Jilted Attention Whore
-Jennifer Aniston
All of the Above
-Paris Hilton
Ms. Hilton, Mr. Cruise, Madonna, and Ms. Lohan were my choices.
I really hope Goopy wins this. Her particular brand of oblivious smug tweaks me like no other.
Besides that: Hilton, Heigl, Fishsticks, Hohan. Hohan and Hilton I’d like to put in a to-the-death battle… winner gets a cheeseburger, every day, for the rest of their lives. Gawd, wommen, eat something!
OK, for me its:
Aniston – Please! No more Jen! Aaaagh!
Heigl – Not sure why she thinks she is a Diva. She is a third-rate actress at best, and full of it.
Paltrow – Goop.
Lohan – Why not?
I wanted to vote 10 times for Ms. Paltrow, but alas I am unable to do so. How much so? Let me count the ways…
Eco hypocrite – guilty
PETA hypocrite – guilty
America is immature Europe is mature hypocrisy – guilty
Naming your child after a fruit – guilty
Hilton: The shenanigans with the pooches are my current rage trigger
Cruise: Too many reasons to list.
Madonna: She’s been a hypocrite for many decades
Beckham: I’ll admit I tossed a coin. Lilo is a rapidly fading starlet whom I still hope manages to pull herself out of the tailspin. Beckham’s actions aren’t quite as egregious, but she’s not as sad either.
Hilton: mostly because she keeps giving interviews about how smart and non-trampy she is
Cruise: even though I think Heigel should win, I think enough people will vote for him
Madonna: she has veiny thighs
Lohan: the whole fake lesbian thing
hilton – thinks she should be the only person famous for no reason
cruise – claims to know more about other people’s illnesses than they do (ridiculous) AND has no knowledge of self
madonna – has been at least 20 different people in her lifetime, so far
posh – claims to be a fashionista but has no taste; takes trashiness to new heights while looking down on everyone else
YUCK.
I just evened up the vote on Madonna V Paltrow. The brackets are getting tougher, especially since I think they’re ALL nuts!
This is so hard. I hate Madonna, and I hate Paltrow. I hate Heigel, but I hate Cruise too.
THIS IS SO HARD.
But yeah, Lohan, you’re not really a lesbian. And Paris, you’re not really anything special. You two are simple pimples. Damned if the other two brackets aren’t sucky though. Argh!
Jenny, Tom, Madge and Vicky. They seem so harmless when you call them by nicknames.
Aniston, Cruise, Paltrow, Lohan. Just basing these on sheer dislike at this point.
I second The Irish, though perhaps I’d move ol’ Madge down a bit more to “attention whore” than “crazy.”
Gwyneth Paltrow and Madonna even?!?!?!
I never thought I would see that !
My only upset vote is for Lohan. I still can’t get past her big chase down the PCH.
*fingers crossed for Tommy to take the bracket~
My votes go for:
Paris Hilton – She has WAAAY more innocent victims (I mean… pets) than Jennifer Aniston. All Aniston does is be annoying. Paris, on the other hand, is annoying AND deadly.
Katherine Heigl – Because we’re voting for Deceiver of the Year, not Wacko of the Year. Then Tom Cruise would win.
Madonna – Because I imagine life with her as a mother would be HELL. And I feel sorry for her children. They need their mom to win this award. Then maybe Madonna would let them eat candy and be like normal kids once in a while, out of fear of being elected as Deceiver of the Year again.
Victoria Beckham – Because she seems to be capable of thought, unlike Lohan, so she might be aware of what a huge hypocrite she is.
This is wierd. It’s like a reverse popularity contest. Do I vote for Madonna because I hate her, or do I not vote for her so I don’t have to keep seeing her name? You’re shattering my paradigms! Stop it!
Damn, can I change my vote? From La Gwyneth today, about Joaquin Phoenix,”What advice would I give to Joaquin? Hmmm…maybe to go live in the projects for a few years to get some authenticity, maybe.” Because, as we all know, Gwynnie has lived in the projects and knows all about being authentic.
Jennifer – Again nothing Paris does is surprising, I’m so bored with her I can’t even be offended or bothered by her behavior anymore, so I went with Jennifer
Tom – The closet case with the brain of a peanut, wants me to give millions of dollars to Zenu to better my life? If Tom cared so much about my thetan covered soul he’d pay my way.
Gwyneth – Right now I find the whole GOOP thing even more annoying than Madonna, strange but true.
Lindsay – I’m actually voting for Lindsay because she tried to market leggings with knee pads. Seeing those made me hate her forever.
paris, tom, gwen, and lindsay. i voted and what a lovely combo!
blah i meant *gwyneth
awww, I missed everyth…
I would have voted for Aniston, Cruise, Paltrow and Beckham…