You remember her, right? Used to be married to that Beatle guy. Saves money on toenail polish. Currently holding her own in Deceiver Madness. Most importantly: Big-time vegan activist. Here’s a typically rational example:
Well, “Meaty” has now made her an offer she couldn’t refuse. Per Ecorazzi:
Heather Mills — yes, that Heather Mills — has just signed a contract worth a reported $6 million dollars to be the face of a new Burger King campaign promoting their vegetarian burger…
On one hand, I understand how this fits into her grand scheme to get more people thinking about veggies — but on the other, that $6 million must have been a HUGE factor. I mean honestly, what vegetarian looks at Burger King and thinks “lunch”. Even with a veggie option, wouldn’t we still be helping to fund a major meat operation?
You’d think!
Are vegetarians really going to walk into a Burger King to get one of these? The smell of actual food might drive them even crazier. And are regular Burger King customers going to say, “Gee, I could really go for a burger, but a five-toed gold-digger says this veggie burger is delish”?
I wonder what they’re going to call it? In honor of her brave struggle with one-leggedness, I propose: The Lopper.
My favorite quote about this whole thing, from one of Heather’s unnamed “friends”:
“Heather is ecstatic. She believes she can change the eating habits of millions.”
Well, she’s about to change mine. Suddenly I’ve got a hankering for a double bacon cheeseburger with extra death.
Update: Mills denies the story, but says it would be awesome if Burger King paid her huge sums of money to promote them. Well, she’s never lied to us before.
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First the creepy plastic Burger King guy, now this crazed whackjob. The PR department must really be working overtime on this. ***rolls eyes***
As funny as “five-toed gold-digger” is, it’s also sort of shocking. And yeah, Swede, BK is really hitting the wrong notes with the marketing lately.
Yeah, that can’t be right. Who on earth would pay Heather Mills for anything let alone 6 million dollars? Am I wrong in thinking that she is one of the most hated human beings on the planet?
I remember how she dragged her Beatle-of-a-husband in Canada to militate against the seal hunt. She as all dove-eyed about the slaughter of peaceful animals. Now, she’s behind a corporation that sponsor the slaughter of millions of those soft mammals.
She deserves a whack behind the head with the carcass of a dead seal.
I don’t know about any of your local BK’s, but you can smell mine in the wind as you approach town.
It’s also the only place I know where you leave smelling charbroiled.
But I’m sure vegans will love wearing eau de boeuf.
This has got to be another sign of the apocalypse.
I would hit it! (circa 1989)
If meat and dairy animals produce extra greenhouse gasses, shouldn’t we eat more of them?
Jrod, EEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW!
I did my part last evening pH, Triple bacon cheeseburger, fries, and 21 year old single malt.
Just for this, I’m going to have to get a Baconator for dinner. I want Taco Bell, but I question whether or not that’s actually made from an animal.
I know she’s denying involvement in this, but I hope it’s true, only because it will make her look like a bigger ass clown than she already is. And here I thought she couldn’t do anything to look dumber.
And is there a mammal-grease-free grill those soy burgers are being cooked on?
Oh boy, just reading this makes me hungry for a triple bacon cheeseburger. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
I gave up meat for Lent (I did it in hopes of losing weight from eating out less, though, so it was pretty selfishly motivated) and I think I’d die. I recognize that you can’t really call burgers from BK – veggie or not – “real food,” but the temptation from the reminder alone would kill me.
Actually, I do really like their double-patty burger with the bacon on it. Thanks, Simon. I have a hankering for one of them now. ]’:
I went and got a Steakhouse Burger combo meal in her honor. STELLLLLLAAAAAAAAA!
Sorry. Y’all are probably too young for Brando/Tennessee Williams references.
Hee. I’m more tired than I thought. That probably would have made more sense if it were Stella McCartney, not HEATHER MILLS, in bed w/the Burger King. And cue barf, right there.
Anyone who goes to the “Home of the Flamebroiled Whopper” for vegetarian food is just plain stupid. As guess as stupid as someone who goes to KFC to buy vegetarian food or just food for the homeless….
I resent Mills’ (and as usual, PETA’s) attempts to wrest control of my body away from me. If you’re pro-choice, be pro-choice across the board (TM Dennis Miller). You and I have the right to decide what to do with our own bodies; if I want to ingest juicy, flame-broiled beef, it’s my body, and I can do exactly that. I can wear wool, or silk, or leather, and I can seek out protein as I know and understand it. My choice.
How long will it be before PETA or some other confederacy of dunces shows up to throw paint at BK customers, and bombard us with images of slaughtered cows…wait. Haven’t they done just that, or something similar? How come it’s wrong when Operation Rescue does that sort of thing in the name of children, but PETA, acting in the name of cattle, gets a pass?
Personal autonomy is personal autonomy, right?
You’d be surprised, Minnow. My (psychotic) vegetarian uncle–as the family story goes; I wasn’t born yet–habitually strolled into BK’s and ordered “a Whopper with everything on it except the burger.” It’s one of many things I’ve never figured out about him. As for me, well, remember in 2005 when BK had not one but two sets of Star Wars toys that were available for like four months? I ate Whopper Jr.’s about twice a day for that whole time trying to collect all of them. I haven’t been able to look at the place since. (That and the creepy plastic King mascot gives me the absolute jibblies.)
Heather just helped my eating habits…I just go to Wendy’s now! Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers, hold the mayo, tomato and hypocrisy! My favorite!
“I propose: The Lopper.”
Simon, I’m in love.
Yes, Beige! If it’s a choice, I get to make it.
Well, until/unless PETA and their minions have their way. At some point, I imagine dietary choice will be outlawed. It sure wouldn’t surprise me if someone attempted to do so, anyway.
I hate that this bitch has my name. Every day when people hear my full name (yes my last name is Mills), they jokingly say “Hey, weren’t you married to Paul McCartney???” I am always so tempted to say, “If I were, I wouldn’t be here dealing with your annoying ass.” But then I’d get fired.