The R&B (rampaging & battering) artist’s new album is dropping, and so is his credibility:
Here’s my best attempt at a transcript:
Yeah, I’m tellin’ you. We not, we not. And I don’t do all this talkin’ on the thing, this just some new stuff I’m doin’, I wanna say what up. ‘Cause I ain’t been out there in a minute. But. New album gonna be comin’ soon. We workin’ on that right now. It’s called Graffiti, got everything on it, know what I’m sayin’? So y’all be ready for that. I’m about to drop a single this summer for y’all, so. We ain’t goin’ nowhere. Everybody that hate us, they just been haters. All my real fans, I love y’all. I ain’t a monster.
This is valuable new information. We now know that Chris Brown has three things: his own bowling alley, at least one friend left, and a complete inability to accept responsibility for his own actions. Oh, and locution worthy of a Shakespearean stage actor. Make that four things.
(Hat tip to The Superficial)
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Oh man.
I totally can’t wait for Chris Brown to take on Christopher Hitchens & Salman Rushdie next.
Nice work on the transcription. That would have taken me an hour and at least three phone calls.
What’s with the royal “we”? There’s no “we”, Chris, just your talentless, abusive and inarticulate self.
I am not a Monster, but I am a loser who beats up women. Denial is the first step. Or maybe the third?
Simon Scowl is either a saint or has cast iron fortitude for being able to listen to that tape long enough to write out a transcript of it.
I fail to see how the two are mutually exclusive!
Oh, he must be sincere, because he made a video.
Chris, you’re an abusive, no-talent douchebag. Yeah, I’m tellin’ you, Chris. You is, you is.
And African American people get mad when people of other races say something about their speech?? No wonder. Chris Brown sounds like the most uneducated person that lives on the planet. I have an extremely autistic nephew that is easier to understand with what he says.
i saw this video earlier today and i was wondering about the bowling alley! and ‘rampaging & battering’.. LOL! so chris brown wants us to know: he’s not a monster (according to him and his lil’ friend lil’ bow wow. yes that’s him. sad i even know that) oh and buy his album!!!
please.
oh and i also could barely understand what the f he was saying. not sure how you got that transcript simon.. all i hear is slurring and “we” perez hilton also talks in third person. its like uh okay, you say “we” to try and make yourself sound important or something? right ok.
Nati and Minnow, y’all done to’ me up from da flo’ up dis mornin’. Holla back.
If that were my best English, I’d dig out my eyeballs with a grapefruit spoon. Chris Brown is an assclown.
Gee, I wonder where racial stereotypes come from.
Sorry Koka I have to disagree with you, Kanye West is the posteer boy for Stupid in the hip hop world. I think Chris Brown is a runner up.
This also reminds me of when R Kelly said similar things with his whole situation (everybody that talks bad are “haters”), and of the things he said on his song “happy people”. Because you know, if you didn’t like him, you weren’t one of the “happy people.” Get it?
This puts Chris Brown in excellent company.
You know, if a white person did this, it wouldn’t be such a big deal.
You know, because white folks are racist?
Just predicting the counterarguments that Chris Brown will produce.
I dunno, Aleric…Kanye’s never been arrested for beating up his girlfriend, so that makes him quite a bit smarter than Brown already. Plus some of his songs are wicked catchy.
Chris Brown is…now poised to surpass R. Kelly on the “douchebags whose dumb videos I like to watch when I get drunk” scale. Not good for you, Chris Brown. Not good.
But you know. I jus been haterz.
’sup, Beige, wut it do? Wut’s gud? Wut u b talkin bout diggin ur eyeballz out, gurl? Plz done be talkin bout no diggin no one’s eyeballz wit no grapefruit spoon – u b givin me the mental image I ain’t gone forget, u no? Yeah, I’m tellin u. I ain’t, I ain’t…U no wut I’m sayin, u no, u no?
@McMom
But the sheer stupidity of Kanye’s lyrics…”How could you be so Dr. Evil?” Really, Kanye? That’s the best you could come up with? What amazes me about Kanye is how such talentless vapid douche managed to develop such an enormous ego…What reason does he have to think as highly of himself as he does? I loved the way South Park pwnt him – that ownage was long overdue.
Heheh, the minute I heard this on the news, I knew it was destined for a Deceiver post! X-D
Sure Chris, a hater calling other people haters, heehee.
See, I can stand being a hater. What I can’t stand is dealing with beaters. An’ yo, U cn step 2 it if U pleez. Or get jiggy wit it, or some other hip thing you kids say these days.
Beige, help me get these kids off my lawn.
LOOK at you kids, with your tight pants and your disco, over there smoking the pot. Get a haircut!
That’s it, I’m going after them with my walker. Geez, can you believe we still don’t think, to quote some of the more eloquent reactions I’ve heard, “dat bitch dun had it comin?”
We need to get with the times. Or get more cats.
We needs to stock up on ammo, is what we needs.