Paris Hilton, without a trace of irony, called out MTV’s reality hit The Hills (on which her boyfriend Doug Reinhardt rose to celebutard fame, or at least tabloid-worthiness):
“The show is, like, so lame and fake. He doesn’t even want to be a part of it. They make up relationships when they’re not there, and he just thinks it’s lame. I’ve never seen the show in my life. I have no idea what it’s about. But he just thought it was cheesy.”
Do I really need to spell out the angle here?
Paris Hilton: purveyor of champagne in a can, designer of hideous plastic shoes, sex tape star turned “role model.”
Paris Hilton, the woman who hired a monk for a publicity stunt. Accomplished faux lesbian. In talks to open her own club in Vegas — a city, I’ll have you know, that is the opposite of cheesy and fake.
Paris Hilton: The picture of class. She simply exudes “reality.”
Plus, you just know Heidi Montag Pratt had acrylic claws implanted at some point, so Paris better watch her back.
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AWWWWWWWWWWW………….NASTY!!!!
Now I need the eye bleach!
And here I thought you could never top Heidi and Spencer. You proved me wrong.
I bet that Doug “Opportunist” Reichardt releases either a tell-all book or Paris Sex Tape 2.0 in about 6-12 months, maybe 2-3 months after they break up. Any takers?
If I’m late in responding, it’s because it look awhile to find my eye bleach…
You know, “lame” and “fake” don’t seem so bad, once you’ve been exposed to Reinhardt’s giant raging PORNO TONGUE. And for the love of Zelda Fitzgerald, when is she going to wrench that asinine headband off? Has it been fused to her hair by a jet of manbutter or something?
Ew. I think I just threw up my whole life over that.
Ya know, I think she was actually talking about The Simple Life! Read that quote again and tell me it doesn’t fit.
Damn you, Holly!
You do realize that this is probably the last article of the week, don’t you?
Now we have to look at a pox-exchange, right up top, ALL FREEKIN’ WEEKEND LONG.
Thanks.
Forget the eye bleach. I’m off to scrape my retinas out.
If you like this picture, here’s another picture that you might also enjoy:
http://www.blahgirls.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/05/paris0521_1.jpg
You’re more than welcome.
What I wouldn’t give to know he’d just had an ipecac Big Gulp. When I wake up screaming at 3 a.m., I am going to come to your house, Nati, and I am going to cut you. With a headband.
*prints several copies of the picture*
*hangs them above all the entries into the house*
Try getting past those, Beige…Those images could ward off Jack the Ripper himself
God Nati, that’s sick!
Where did she learn to kiss….wait. Forget I said anything.
I really don’t want to know.
Holly, that picture is gross. I feel an itch going on down there as we speak.
Classy.
His hand is scary.
Nasty Nasty Nasty. Paris knows fake like the pope know pedophiles. How many BFF seasons are we going to have? Cuz it doesn’t seem like any of them last.
Hee, these comments. I’m evil once you get to know me. Just be grateful I didn’t post the close-up.
paris is FOUL. and the hills has had its run, time’s up. but paris shouldn’t even be talking!
Achtung! Genie bei der Arbeit
On another note, having just looked at Nati’s pic. Do people normally kiss like this? Have I been doing it wrong? I’m not one to try to stick my tongue down someone’s throat from 12 inches away.
Rocko, I don’t speak German (Mandarin and French, but no German). Does that say “Warning! Genius at work”? Or “Grandma loves ham salad?”
Yech – we did not need to see that. I’ll take the eye bleach when you’re finished Koka
Well I didn’t know those headbands were considered stupid! What am I gonna do with all of these things now?!
You guys just don’t know fashion that’s all.
Whichever one’s funnier Beige.
Eeeeecch! Who the hell kisses tongue first? Mind you, this could be mid-kiss and he pulled back and then…ugggggghhhh, I don’t want to think about it anymore!
Octomom finally gets her TV show.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090531/ap_on_re_us/us_octuplets_2
Anyone notice that Paris started talking trash about a show on MTV about a week before her own MTV show starts it’s new season?
Shikatehead, my husband and I kiss tongue first, although usually we get a running start for maximum mouth impact. We both also wear sparkly headbands. That ensures our daughter gets the highest possible level of emotional trauma from witnessing the activity.
MC Mom: And all of this, of course, occurs in slow motion, possibly with “Chariots of Fire” playing in the background.
Absolutely, Shikatehead. Because my life is one giant photo op/movie trailer.
MC Mom, I wish life was kind of like a movie trailer: you get to see all the good bits, because overall the full version sometimes sucks.
I don’t know, Shikatehead. The constant baritone narration might get annoying.
She was a smalltown woman… and she needed milk. But when? When? When would she get to the store? What would the kids do without milk for their cocoa pebbles? What would her husband dunk his blueberry poptart into? And the cat? What. About. The. Poor. Cat?
A woman, a challenge, a choice…
Coming this summer to a theater near you: Minnow’s Grocery Adventure.
Life in the 15 items or less lane has never been this hilarious.
“In a world where milk is upwards of $5 a gallon…one woman stands alone.”
(Cue “Solisbury Hill”)
“Coming soon: Coupon…When You Have to Make Cents.”
Cue the sound of MC Mom’s snack being laughed out her nostrils…damn. Gotta remember not to eat or drink when I visit this site.
I don’t know, Minnow and Beige…”Minnow’s Grocery Adventure” and “Coupon” sound a heckuva lot more entertaining than “Sorry, Honey, I Forgot to Stop at the ATM” or “The MC Mom Spreadsheet Supremacy.”
Heh. “Find Jason Bourne; you’ll find my keys.”
Eva Longoria was on The Situation Room (must have been a slooooow news day, I know) the other night, blathering on about her ideas on immigration (like she knows anything about the plight of most illegal immigrants). *sigh*. Granted, she did grow up on a supposedly spartan style farm where she was teased by siblings….but she was born HERE, therefore is a US Citizen….*sigh*. Again, those you would assume would be in the know, esp. based on their commentary, as usual are clueless.