As you know if you’ve been anywhere near a TV, radio, newspaper, website, or single other human being in the last 24 hours, yesterday South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford confessed to an extramarital affair with a woman in Argentina. The Columbia, SC newspaper The State immediately published e-mails it had obtained months ago between Sanford and the woman, “Maria,” and… boy, are they steamy. But not in a dirty way, really. Kind of clumsy, but obviously heartfelt. Not to say that what he’s done is right, but this is no quickie with an intern; he’s clearly in love with this woman. Speaking only for myself, I’d be very happy to get e-mails like that from anybody who wasn’t under a court order to stay away from me.
One observer who wasn’t quite as impressed with Sanford’s wooing technique was MSNBC’s second-loudest mouth (and a distant second in his timeslot), Keith Olbermann:
If you watched all 7 minutes of that without getting paid for it, you’re probably eligible for some sort of medal.
Among those unimpressed in turn with Olbermann was this Daily Kos diarist:
Keith Olbermann, he who likes to give out the worst person in the world award, has just garnered the prize from me for the biggest piece of crap in the world…
Personally I don’t believe Sanford or his mistress should be spared even the tiniest bit of embarrassment for their actions. People need to live their consequences. That said, in this grown-up world of politics we have forgotten that there are four innocent lives, five actually, whose only transgression was that by choice or involuntarily they were involved with Mark Sanford. Have you no decency man?
As I listened to him sarcastically reading the e-mails written between Sanford and his mistress, correspondence I sure they both believed would stay private, I kept imagining Olbermann as that pervert in a dirty movie studio choking his chicken underneath his trenchcoat.
Yeeowtch! Well, it is kind of tough to imagine, oh, Edward R. Murrow taking such fiendish delight in, say, JFK’s mash notes to Marilyn. If the treatment of a disgraced Republican is beyond the pale even for a Daily Kos diarist, it might be time for Olbermann to take a step back.
Particularly considering Kreepy Keith’s own problems with embarrassing leaked e-mails!
A few years back, a woman calling herself KarmaBites1 filled up the gossip pages with tales of Olbermann’s rather, um, limp approach to dating. Page Six, 10/06/06:
A brown-haired beauty who claims she had an unsatisfying one-night stand with Keith Olbermann is getting her sweet revenge — she’s launched a blog to warn other women about the acerbic MSNBC commentator’s boorish bedroom habits.
The bitter babe, who calls herself KarmaBites1, says she doesn’t want others “to fall into the same trap… and I want him to feel some remorse for what he’s done…”
A 30-something office worker of Caribbean descent, KarmaBites1 said she struck up an e-mail friendship with Olbermann, whom she admired, and agreed to fly to New York to meet him last May. She says he came to her hotel room and opened a bottle of Merlot which he “spilled all over.” Then, when “sexual activity began [in] less than an hour,” Olbermann had difficulty. “I pretended he knew what he was doing,” the embittered blogger writes. “I adored the guy. I didn’t want him to think he was a dud in bed,” so she faked experiencing ecstasy.
Next, he piled on excuses as to why he had to leave. “He told me he’s an insomniac and that it’s hard for him not to sleep in his own bed. He also mentioned he hadn’t had ‘company’ in a while. [He said] he had an early meeting with the Yankees [and] he might be allergic to the pillows in the hotel bed.”
Six days later, she claims, Olbermann e-mailed her to tell her never to contact him again.
Nice! It’s interesting that he brought up the Yankees, considering he had just missed his at-bat.
The KarmaBites1 blog was called forthisreliefmuchthanks.blogspot.com. It was named for the Hamlet quote that she claimed was Olbermann’s farewell to her as he skittered off with his, er, rapier between his legs. And if that doesn’t sound like something Keith Olbermann would say as he awkwardly exited a bungled one-night stand, I don’t know what does.
Soon after, KarmaBites1 threatened to release 100 e-mails she claimed Olbermann had sent her, but apparently she never did. And Olbermann has never commented on any of it one way or another. She took down her blog the next July, or at least made it unavailable to the public, and it’s not archived at the Internet Wayback Machine:
We’re sorry, access to http://forthisreliefmuchthanks.blogspot.com has been blocked by the site owner via robots.txt.
Weird! Yet oddly familiar.
Well, if you know where a humble blogger can find a copy of any of that stuff, or if you have contact info for KarmaBites1, I’d be glad to provide the same sort of intelligent, evenhanded analysis we just saw from Mr. Olbermann.
It’s the least I can do, Keith!
Update: Are Mary Carey, Rebecca Lobo, and Olbermann’s old social studies teacher available for comment? (Hat tip to commenter Iowahawk!)
Update: Intrepid journalist Keith Olbermann has blown the lid off yet another pill bottle! I mean conspiracy! He takes to the Daily Kos to tell his detractors: “Be forewarned: you may be part of a plan to make it look like I’m under siege by the Left.” Or people just might not like your behavior, Keith, even though it’s targeting somebody you don’t like. I know it sounds crazy.
Update: A past Olbermann response to criticism: “Kill yourself.” Gotta balance out the screeds of hatred coming from the right!