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09
Jun
09

Mel Gibson Demands Paternity Test on Mistress’s Child

mel_gibson_drunkSo you all know by now how I feel about Mel Gibson and his peculiarly judgy brand of Christianity, so long as it means he gets to wield all the fire and brimstone. You’ve also probably deduced that I feel for Robyn Gibson, his long-suffering wife of 28 years and mother of his first seven children. Normally I’m not one to root for alimony, but after the decades of other women and drunkenness and public humiliation she’s endured, she is entitled to every penny the court makes him pay. She’s earned it.

Anyway, in light of all his infidelity and skeeviness, this development is rich:

Mel Gibson reportedly wants his pregnant girlfriend to take a paternity test because he wants to know if he is the father of her unborn baby.

“Mel really loves Oksana, but he’s a businessman, too. He really had no choice but to ask for a DNA test,” an insider told a tabloid.

Mel’s [kids] are the ones who convinced him to take a paternity test to make sure he is the father.

“Some of Mel’s closest friends in his church convinced him that it’s the practical thing to do. There’s just too much at stake,” the insider added.

“Mel doesn’t believe that Oksana has been with anyone else, but after hearing misgivings from his children and friends, he decided he had no choice. Oksana wasn’t happy about it, but once her baby is born, there will be a paternity test.”

How nice of him to force his mistress to undergo a paternity test. I understand that his fortune is at stake, but he of all people really needs to get off his fidelity high horse.

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27 Responses to “Mel Gibson Demands Paternity Test on Mistress’s Child”


  1. 1 Pastafarian Jun 9th, 2009 at 2:58 pm

    God I love that picture.

  2. 2 LN Jun 9th, 2009 at 3:19 pm

    Look, if you didn’t realize this by now the head of a church is always allowed to be overly preachy when it comes to the issues of fidelity. Its following the law of the land they don’t do well.

    And lets be honest, what kind of woman has sexual relations with a married man who happens to be this twisted kind of Catholic that is so old school the Pope doesn’t even recognize it as a form of Catholisism.

  3. 3 Wemedge Jun 9th, 2009 at 3:21 pm

    Since the woman at issue is one who decided to carry on with the married father of seven children, it isn’t far fetched to think that, you know, she might be kind of a whore. I’d like to think Mel was coming to his senses, but I somehow doubt that’s possible.

  4. 4 Ani Jun 9th, 2009 at 3:35 pm

    If she has nothing to hide she wouldn’t be unhappy about being asked. If she took offense, she is clearly hiding something or isn’t 100% sure. It’d serve smelly Mel right to find out it isn’t his.

  5. 5 angry army wife Jun 9th, 2009 at 3:49 pm

    I would ask for one too. If she was a homewrecker with him could mean she wrecked others homes as well.

  6. 6 MC Mom Jun 9th, 2009 at 3:51 pm

    Well, I wouldn’t be particularly happy if my husband demanded a paternity test. But that’s because, you know, we’re married and monogamous and no one’s been banging any ho bags.

  7. 7 Beige Jun 9th, 2009 at 6:14 pm

    Good enough for both of them. I can’t think of a single better way to show how committed you are to your new life with a human trampoline, than to order her to produce legal proof that her crumbsnatcher was actually produced by your very own little swimmers. Mazel tov, Mel!

    (Heh. Because he hates Jews, see.)

  8. 8 Rocko Jun 9th, 2009 at 6:21 pm

    I’m with Mel here because if everyone’s coming to you telling you to get a test, you should get a test.

  9. 9 Pastafarian Jun 9th, 2009 at 6:35 pm

    With $500 million at stake I’d have her tested for rabies if I thought it was necessary.

  10. 10 TX Dragon Jun 9th, 2009 at 6:38 pm

    He finally added up the divorce settlement and wants a way out.

  11. 11 Shikatehead Jun 9th, 2009 at 11:11 pm

    You know you’ve done some serious drinkin’ when you need to use two skanks as crutches.

  12. 12 Fortunate Son Jun 10th, 2009 at 3:03 am

    She has a kid with ex-007 Timothy Dalton, also.

  13. 13 katie Jun 10th, 2009 at 6:54 am

    oh mel, you are the biggest idot. god.

  14. 14 snapnhiss Jun 10th, 2009 at 6:55 am

    I’ve read a little background on this woman and she’s apparently a career mistress to the rich and famous. I imagine Mel’s kids feel pretty much the way Paul McCartney’s did when old peg leg darkened their doorway.

  15. 15 Beige Jun 10th, 2009 at 9:53 am

    Wow. Who’d have thought Mel would be shopping on the “Pre-Owned Sexworkers” aisle? I guess she was, like, 30% off or something.

  16. 16 Minnow Jun 10th, 2009 at 12:18 pm

    …she’s apparently a career mistress to the rich and famous.

    So she’s not a Russian mail-order bride?

    I figured that was the only reason she’d put up with his holinessassitude.

  17. 17 MC Mom Jun 10th, 2009 at 1:29 pm

    Well, Beige, after the divorce he’s only gonna be worth $500M so he’s gotta make budget cuts somewhere.

  18. 18 Rumor Control Jun 10th, 2009 at 2:41 pm

    Well she is a profesional homewrecjer, star-stalker, and pink flute player.

    She Also dated multi biillionaire music producer David Foster, who bought her a house at Santa Minica, 200 m form Icon Production where she dated Mel, and she dated both men at THE VERY SAME TIME WITHOUT ANY OF THEM KNOWING IT!
    AND THEY WERE BOTH MARRIED AND ARE NOW BOTH IN THE MIDDLE OF A DIVORCE BECASUE OF HER!

    another problem is that she migth not be pregy at all!

    she was strill ,livingin her mansion wiht David Foster in april 2009, a month ago, so if sh eis 4-5 month pregny now i will have doubnt as for whom the dady might be.
    She also say she is a classical trianed pianist english music colege and moscva conservatorium, yet after 14 eyars livign with timothy dalton(james bond) that she coined by getting pregy 4 weeks after meeting him, and after 2 years dating Music mogul David Foster, she didnt land a sinhgle record nor concert ever.. and now wiht Mle gibson all she got is a miserable demo tape, with 4 tracks, outdated form 2002, with sity poor liric soundign as if taken form a teen’s dairy, and shwoign one thing for sure: THAT SHE IS OVER 70% TUNE DEAF AND AN HOPELESS CASE IF SHE HAD SO MUCH MUSICAL TRAINING FOR SO MANY YEARS.

    SHE SING FAUSLE AND PLAY PIANO OUT OF KEY, WHICH CRAVE YOUR SKILLS OT BE BE ABOE TO HIT THE TANGENTS SO WRONGLY THAT YOU ACTUALY MAKE THE PIANO SOUNDS LIKE IF IT WASNT TUNED!

    So whend she could lie so much about so many basic things i will say she alsolied about being pregy. we seen pics of her anda lot, in the past months, still not a single one of her being pregy.
    And the reason why she is uncomfortable with beign tested is that or she isnt pregy or she know pertinetly that the kid isnt les own but David foster’s kid or someone else she did at a party.
    She has been a lot around using one man to get to the enxt the whole time.

    Sh eis a slut and a pro hoemwrecker breakign 2 homes with 2 married men both wiht several kids at once, and in both cases for the purpose of making money and her megalomania..
    If she beleive that she is an accomplished pianist and can make a carriere in the businees at age 45 (or more) when she never palyed a concert in her life nor entered a studio, and this thuis dating the biggest msuic producer David foster, then she need to see a shrinck!
    the reasonm why David Foster never produced her was simply becasue she coudlnt isng nor play and her interpretations were so low. She sing faulse. and play fausle too.
    And she is unable ot hear it.
    Thats really bad.

    And she isnt workign at Icon record label atall, it was a lie too, she is at NRG studio and signed in an unknown entertainemnt co in London.
    And she do not live in a house owned by Mel Gibson in sherman oaks LA either, nor is living with Mel Gibson, nor meeting him.
    So sounds like they are not together at all,.
    And 2 sundays ago when mel made a angry rant at chruhc, she was there and he ordered he rot be thrown out..
    which says it all
    and she went to Radar online and sold the story that Mle had forbid parishioners ot gossip, whne in factr he had ask them to stop seling stories ot th epress
    not knowign that the one selign juicy gosdsips ot the Natioanl Enquirer and Radaronoine and People magazin since augsut 2008 to today, was and sgtil is: oksana grigorieva!
    it is her behind all te slandwer tllike the one above, comign the media gossip beforehand, by plantign her own vwersion of hte facts:’
    like Mle gisbnon dont want to do so cause he love her dso much, yeah yeha its hhis family and frends and æarsihoner that psuhed him.. yea yeah..
    the same all way aroud last week it was her THREATENING (BAHAHAH) MG to leave him (and his billions?) fi he wasnt ot come into rehab.. and before that her fairy tale that they werent livign together but (of course) it was of HER own choice for her son (the one she got wiht james bond).. and bnot cause mel didnt wanted to hear form ehr nor see her.. and telign they were meeting everyday “after work” lololol like Mel Gibson had 8 to 5 workign hours LOLOL at his office (where he practicaly never is) and hten they both go to their respective home, her in LA and him in Malibu.. ehem.. yeah yeah.
    the truth is that they have no ocntacts at all sinmce april and she isnt pregy of him and she tried to get mroe money form him t shut up and he cant get rid of her.
    As simple as that!.
    she is a reckless golddigger and a slut and thats all there is ot it.

  19. 19 Minnow Jun 10th, 2009 at 5:01 pm

    Happy hour, already?

  20. 20 Ani Jun 10th, 2009 at 7:37 pm

    No kidding, Minnow. I quit reading after the first paragraph. I am not able to read in “moron” :(

  21. 21 fozzy Jun 10th, 2009 at 8:21 pm

    The fuck? You can actually see the coherence break down as you get further into that comment.

  22. 22 Beige Jun 10th, 2009 at 9:05 pm

    OH. MY. LORD. I think the phrase “form a teen’s dairy” might get you in legal trouble, RC.

    I couldn’t decipher the rest of it because I was too busy making sure my tank is fight. I kill you again, harder! You old damned guy!

  23. 23 TrojanPrincess Jun 10th, 2009 at 9:29 pm

    ROTFL

  24. 24 Snoop-Diggity-DANG-Dawg Jun 11th, 2009 at 9:11 am

    Watching the Mel Gibson train-wreck makes me want to just look away. He’s abandoned his faith, his values, his wife and his children. At the end of the day, what’s left to keep him from putting a yet another bottle to his lips?

  25. 25 MC Mom Jun 11th, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    Beige, that entry makes my teenage diaries look like Crime and Punishment. But then again, we didn’t have those lovely web acronyms in the 80s. ;-)

  26. 26 trauma_queen Aug 7th, 2009 at 7:15 pm

    I resent the term homwrecker and so what if Oksana is a professional mistress to the rich and famous? She didn’t drag these men kicking and screaming away from their families. Like a lot of men, they were thinking with their dicks and not their brains. They saw a piece of ass, she saw an opportunity. As for Mel, I love how sanctimonious Catholics go on about how holy they are when they clearly don’t even know what the ten commandments are much less the actual rules of their church.

  1. 1 Mel Gibson Annuls 29-Year Marriage Through Secret Tribunal at Deceiver.com Pingback on Jul 31st, 2009 at 6:13 pm

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