Kendra Wilkinson is best known for allowing a man older than her grandfather to do things to her private parts — or at least claim to — along with two other young women who lived with him at the time. So it’s only natural that she’s super-excited about being the Most Christianest Mom, Like, Ever!

While Hugh Hefner’s 23-year-old former flame has led a pretty wild life (besides being Hugh Hefner’s girlfriend, the number of times she’s revealed her assets in public is well into the double digits), and said earlier this year that[Hank] Baskett was helping her find God for the first time, she is determined to be a strict religious mama.

“Our child will definitely be Christian,” Wilkinson told Tarts last week, with Baskett adding that they are going to be “very strict” yet still “spoil” their young ones at appropriate times.

“But they are going to have to earn it, we’re not just going to hand it to them. Most importantly, they have to keep good grades because school comes first and then everything else after that.”

So basically, she’s publicly repudiating everything that has made her who she is today. “That’s right, kids, you’d better stay in school and say your prayers and keep your clothes on, or you might end up rich and famous like me!” It’s tough enough getting your kids to listen to you in the first place, let alone when their friends have the complete Girls Next Door box set.

That’s assuming Kendra even understands what Christianity is. Hint: Yelling “Oh my God, you guys!” is not a prayer.