If you’ve been watching the network news lately, you haven’t heard a word about Climategate. Which might be one indication why nobody watches the network news anymore. But if you have access to this cool new thing called the Internet — which you do, right? — there’s all sorts of information about climate scientists faking evidence and stifling their critics, and about the frantic efforts to explain it all away by everyone with an investment in the idea that WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE FROM GLOBAL WARMING. It’s become a big business, all this Green stuff. So it’s only, ahem, natural that the people with a lot to lose are reluctant to admit the game is up.
That’s why the United Nations climate change conference in Copenhagen next week is going to be so much fun. The London Times has a good roundup of the various celebrity ecocrites flying around telling us not to fly around — Sheryl Crow, John Travolta, Harrison Ford, Oprah, Trudie Styler, U2, Chris Martin, Al Gore, Prince Charles, et al. — and also points out:
The Copenhagen summit next week will generate vast quantities of hot air. It will see 16,500 people coming in from 192 countries. That amounts to 41,000 tons of carbon dioxide, roughly the same as the carbon emissions of Morocco in 2006. Also, the organisers will lay 900 kilometres of computer cable and 50,000 square miles of carpet. More than 200,000 meals will be served and visitors will drink 200,000 cups of coffee — at least that will be organic.
When asked if the carbon footprint might have been reduced by turning Copenhagen into a video conference, a spokesman for the event said: “For such a major agreement, people need to meet together and negotiate face to face. We have delegates from all over the world. Video-conferencing systems are extremely useful, but they don’t match the personal touch. This is one of the main factors in having a good conference.”
This might make sense if there were anything to negotiate. But there isn’t. It’s a hoax. The only reason all these people need to widen their carbon footprints to attend this thing is that they want to be seen attending. They want you to watch them save the world. That’s probably why Obama finally decided to go. What good is being a selfless servant of mankind if nobody knows about it?
If they really thought what they were saying was true, they’d never take another airy-plane ride in their lives. Carbon offsets? Treehugga please. How many mango trees can you possibly plant to offset so much alleged environmental destruction? Not that you’re planting them yourself, of course. You’re donating a minuscule portion of your wealth to somebody who tells you they’re planting mango trees. Which gives you a sense of smug satisfaction as you jet all over the world telling people to stop getting to their jobs on time and seeing where they’re going at night.
The good news is that all these famous people can stop feeling guilty about living like human beings. You’re not really killing the polar bears, Leonardo DiCaprio. You can stop recycling your bathwater, Ed Begley. Seriously. Please stop recycling your bathwater. You have to be around other people.
Update: Commenter Vince asks, “Whatever happened to the Ozone Hole?”
Update: Ah, here’s what happened to the Ozone Hole… It’s fixing itself! Which is now bad, because it’ll cause more global warming or something. Whatever, just shut up and pay your taxes, rubes.
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I just noticed their list of celebs that’ll be attending. Sheryl Crow, John Travolta, Harrison Ford, Oprah, Trudie Styler, U2, Chris Martin, Al Gore. If we were sitting in a class, and you admitted to thinking any of these people were cool, I’d whip an eraser at the back of your head. Then the teacher would throw me out, and on the way to the dean’s office I’d go smoke in the bathroom were I’d run into Adam C, or Kenny, and we’d spend the afternoon drinking in the woods across the street. What were we talking about again?
That’s why they’re not teleconferencing this nonsense. There wouldn’t be a public spectacle and no announcements of see-what-a-wonderful-person-I-am-you-little-peon. And that’s just from Obama.
Wonder if Sheryl Crow will wash her hands before meeting these people.
Here we have an industry backed by 70 some billion dollars of tax payer money and they cannot even make the case for a carbon – climate link without massaging the facts. And these fools are running off to Copenhagen like nothing has changed. Fucking useless.
This link takes you to an interesting paper on politics,science and the global warming money machine:
http://scienceandpublicpolicy.org/images/stories/papers/originals/climate_money.pdf
Global Cooling is once more the real peril. I’m revving up the V-8 in celebration.
“What good is being a selfless servant of mankind if nobody knows about it?”
One of the best lines I’ve read in a long time.
OK, so video conferencing won’t work for such an “important” event. Will these people all “plane pool?” Will Oprah let other celebs hitch a ride on her private jet? And will the fancy meals served to all of the fancypants be of the organic, “sustainable” variety?
Of course, as has been pointed out here and elsewhere on the Internet, as well as on Fox and talk radio, there really isn’t anything to discuss, as AGW is a HOAX…but the tuxes have been rented and the hall has been reserved. What else to do than to put on a good show for the hoi polloi?
“Treehugga please.”
I now have to wipe eggnog from my computer screen, thanks.
the timing of “climategate” emails is awesome! I am so glad at least the British press still has some stones left to stand up against this nonsense. I was at a Buffalo Bills game yesterday and a bunch of guys toasted Al Gore & Global warming for the great weather. One mentioned the emails and the others had no idea what we was talking about so I said “it’s because you all get your news from the American press!”
It was great. Oh yeah, the Bills won and I got drunk and a bit of a tan to boot. Thanks Al.
Haven’t these people ever heard of commercial flying or webinars? John Travolta flies his own 747 for crying out loud. And don;t tell me they are hybrids.
Well, I for one am glad all these charter members of the Witless Protection Program are headed to Copenhagen in person. Now all we need is an outraged movie critic with a couple of grenades, and the world really CAN be a better place.
We should take this opportunity and dome them in….like in the Simpsons Movie. We would never have to hear from them again! Think about how good for the enviorment that would be!
So negotiating over video conferences doesn’t really work, but businesses should totally video conference rather than send one or two people to other countries to work out deals. Sounds like another case of “it’s okay when I do it, just not when anyone else does it”.
Interesting piece on disposable diapers having a lower carbon footprint than cloth diapers.
http://randd.defra.gov.uk/Document.aspx?Document=WR0705_7589_FRP.pdf
I was thinkin along those lines too, Beige, but then they’d probably all be declared martyrs and new chapters added to all the holy books.
Copenhagen is a nice city. I’m all for doming them in, but only if we get them out of Copenhagen first.
Please don’t convince everyone that there is no global warning until I finish making my magical self-charging electric generator box. I need everyone to believe we are doomed so that I can sell my patent at a high price. Then I can buy my own jet so that I don’t have to ride around with the unwashed masses.
This will be a lengthy post, but please bear with me.
Just a few years ago the big environmental crisis was the “Ozone Hole”. Every time I turned around someone was crying and gnashing their teeth about how we were all going to die from skin cancer.
And so laws were passed banning the use of certain aerosols and refrigerants. Regulations increased. (As is usually the case with the latest crisis-of-the-week.)
But now I hear absolutely NOTHING about the Ozone Hole any more. Not a peep. Haven’t for several years, in fact. Has the crisis been averted? You see, the Ozone Hole fiasco is an excellent glimpse into the mindset of the Greenies and how it relates to global warming. The purpose of Ozone Hole hysteria wasn’t to close this alleged hole, but to increase government control and regulation. Which it did. The Greenies succeeded with their Ozone Hole experiment.
Ask yourself exactly why we haven’t heard anything about the Ozone Hole any more. (At least, I haven’t heard anything, and I suspect most of you here don’t hear much these days about it, either.) If the crisis has been averted, one would think the Greenies would be shouting it from the rooftops. “We’ve been saved! We’re not going to die from skin cancer now!” But they aren’t doing that. However, if they admit that it has *NOT* been averted and that we still are at risk of dying from increasing solar radiation leaking through, then why the silence? Shouldn’t they be advocating even greater regulation in regards to the Ozone Hole?
You see, they achieved their objective. The two main “bad guys” in the Ozone Hole drama were CFC’s and certain refrigerants. They successfully banned those substances. But they haven’t declared victory in the war against the Ozone Hole. They are just curiously silent. Why? Either the crisis has been averted, or it hasn’t. One case gives reason to publicly celebrate, the other gives reason to publicly call for even stricter measures.
Their goal wasn’t to close the Ozone Hole, it was to achieve more regulation. Once they reached that goal, they silently let it slide into obscurity and went on to the next environmental crisis: global warming.
This whole global warming fiasco will play out similarly to the Ozone Hole crisis. If (or when) they achieve their goal of even greater government control and taxation, then you won’t hear about global warming any more. They won’t declare victory, nor will they publicly proclaim it a continuing crisis. It will simply cease to be.
And then they will move on to the next environmental crisis. One which will conveniently require even more government control, even greater taxes, even more globalization, even more say in how we live our lives.
I love you, Vince.
I love you also Vince. I’m just mad that I didn’t think of that first.
Lets assume they are right about needing to be inperson, I still find it hard to believe that copenhagen is the best location to hold it if carbon footprint is a priority at all. Keep in mind that they are laying new carpets, etc, they can’t possibly make do with existing carpet, they can’t make minimal “sacrifices” while they are trying to pass laws to force the rest of us back to the stone age.
I propose we try to get every famous person making a stink about global warming to make a simple pledge to always take commercial airline flights anytime one is available to get them where they need to go, pretty simple, right? Still would allow them to take private jets if they can’t get where they need to go, but otherwise they are going to do what they can to minimize their impact just like the rest of us. Anyone that won’t make that minimal pledge while at the same time claiming the sky is falling is a hypocrite of the highest order.
@David Maggard – Probably so at least one of the “singers” can perform “Wonderful Wonderful Copenhagen” in their best Danny Kaye impression.
It’ll be on the soundtrack. Trust me.
Vince – great start, but you only hit on one of the many fads that have been conveniently forgotten since they’ve been debunked or the desired legislation passed.
Anyone remember acid rain? That evil monstrosity that was going to melt our buildings and give everyone skin conditions? Still haven’t been able to pinpoint exactly what killed that one off but I’m guessing the fact our faces haven’t gone all Ark of the Covenant yet had something to do with it.
Then you’ve got that pesky global cooling thing people try to pretend never happened. Seriously, are these guys literally banking on the premise most people were too high to remember the seventies?
Can’t forget mercury and arsenic levels in the water. Can we count killer bees? Not sure if it fits the category or not, but any list is made more awesome with their inclusion.
In fact, now that I think about it, the whole killer bee thing seemed to go out right about the time global warming alarmists started going off the deep end. It’s almost like the whole thing was orchestrated to draw attention away from the impending bee invasion. Anyone ever checked Al Gore for antennae? I’ll continue this just as soon as I investigate that ominous buzzing sound in the back yard.
As it turns out, the Ozone Hole is fixing itself. And guess what? That’s causing more global warming!
Beige – for some reason I am thinking of “Team America” when I read your post. “F U Matt Damon!”
For the record, Travolta owns and flies a 707 (painted with a ’60s Quantas paintscheme), not a 747. Both have 4 engines. He is qualified to fly everything from a little 1-engine 1-seater all the way up to a 747. He was trained by Quantas to fly as a first officer for them in a 747, and has done promo work for them. He once had to emergency land a Gulfstream of his at Washington National airport due to total electrical failure, at night, in clouds (meaning no radios or navigation equipment). He had a handheld navigation radio that saved his butt. H Ford has been a pilot for several years now. On Sept 29, H Ford ended 5 years as being the chairman of the Experimental Aircraft Association’s Young Eagles Program (www.eaa.org), passing the reins to the US Airways pilots Sully Sullenberger and Jeff Skiles. Cliff Robertson was the chairman before that, I think.
Anyway, I seriously doubt either Ford or Travolta will be speaking against aviation.
For themselves, no.
I was just wondering what happened to the Ozone hole like two weeks ago! Way to satisfy my every need, internets!
They are so steeped in aviation, and in spreading the word out about the joys of learning to fly, I’ll really be surprised if they do speak against aviation for others. Then they’ll definitely deserve their own special custom-made hypocrisy awards. There are other “anti-something” topics they can discuss.
But, I’ve been surprised before — we’ll see.
And while in Copenhagen one can shake hands with Al Gore for a paltry $1209us. Sorry I am going to have to miss that.
Travolta will never speak against aviation. After all, who’s gonna fly the plane when the next Xenu straps us all to volcanoes? Somebody has gotta drop the hydrogen bombs on us so that we can be infected with evil Thetans.
Come on people, get with the program!
Oh come on! Celebs are helping by educating the public about how bad they are! You know, spreading the word. That’s their effort to save the planet; they don’t need to sacrifice anything else since they’ve done more than enough already. (makes shooing motions with hands) Now go on peons! Change your light bulbs and stop having so many kids!
Scary to think that’s probably what actually goes on in their heads.
Yeah, stop having kids, so that there will be even less people to fund Social Security and whatever craptastic health care “plan” gets passed this month. Of course, that WOULD be less people to cover…but illegal immigrants will plug that hole real quick.
Everyone concerned about AGW should just hold their breath for a while. Say, thirty minutes or so. The planet should cool immediately from the lack of hot air.
And now for the hilarious postscript to the Ozone Hole scare:
We now have a nationwide vitamin D deficiency in children!
Yep, all you Purell-Mommies out there buying cow-fart-free milk and slathering the kidlettes with 9 coats of Coppertone’s SPF 90,000… there ARE consequences.
Give me an R! Gim’me an I! Gim’me a C-K-E-T-S! What does that spell? Third World Fun!!!!
Oh, and another fun tidbit:
http://thebulletin.us/articles/2009/11/15/top_stories/doc4b004bbeeeca0983629489.txt
I also love you, Scott. And you, Simon.
Curses. Deceiver does terrible things with my emotions!
Carbonhagen – haha oh the hypocrisy of it all. The whole thing is now revealed to be based onf raud – they dont even have the integrity to call the whole scam off!