The buzz is that a woman who called Glenn Beck’s radio show yesterday started quite a brush fire by claiming that the Build-a-Bear Workshop company was telling kids Christmas might be canceled on account of global warming. The “Big Government” blog serves up the evidence: a little cartoon video that was available on a Build-a-Bear kids’ website. (It was available until a few hours ago, anyway, when the company’s Bear-knuckled founder yanked it.)
Apparently, the Build-a-BarBearians think we evil carbon emitters are threatening Santa’s liftoff with our unBearable polar-ice-cap-melting insanity. Or something like that.
(That’s Part II. Here are Part I and Part III.)
Now, my daughter is the enthusiastic owner of a rainbow Bear with red sunglasses, a blonde wig, and a stars-and-stripes shirt. The creature’s name, I’m told, is “Fugala America.” (I hope she’s that creative someday on her college entrance essays.) So I object when the little stuffed creature’s creators serve my kid an overBearing wheelBearrow of B.S.
Yes, “Bear shit.’” Santa says,:”We know, the climate is changing. There’s bound to be a little melting.” And the polar bear replies: “It’s worse than that, Santa, a lot worse! At the rate it’s melting, the North Pole will be gone by Christmas!”
This particular bit of Christmas fiction (no, not the Santa part — he’s real) has a distinct Bearing on this website, since the Build-a-Bear empire isn’t exactly a carbon-neutral enterprise itself. Have you seen the last-minute Christmas offer on their website?
Place your order by Wednesday, 12/23 @ 12pm EST and use Next Day Air shipping to deliver by Christmas Day!
Flying a toy cross-country on a FedEx plane because someone was too lazy to order ahead? Why, you might as well just point your hair dryer at a glacier.
Turns out that if anyone is endangering the polar Bears who wave the little orange flashlights so Santa’s sleigh can clear North Pole Bearspace and head for the Bearing Sea, it’s these emBearassing Bear Bears. I Bearantee it.
Sorry.
Here’s something from the Build-a-Bear website. It’s a little ditty I like to call “Endless Hugs Teddy was made in Shenyang”:
The majority of our products (similar to the entire toy industry) including our bears, clothing and many accessories are produced in China. We have long term business relationships with a narrow supplier base which allows us to manage our factories and visit all of them to ensure the highest standards are maintained.
That’s right. Fugala America’s real name is Sum Ting Wong.
China produces more than 21 percent of the world’s CO2 emissions. (Yes, more than the United States does.) And one-third of China’s emissions come from factories that make products to export to the West.
But the Bear cartel is smart:
Our supplier factories are compliant with the International Council of Toy Industries (ICTI) CARE (Caring, Awareness, Responsible, Ethical) certification, a program to promote ethical manufacturing, in the form of fair labor treatment, as well as employee health and safety, in the toy industry supply chain worldwide.
Y’know what’s really easy to do? Let’s find out if all this talk of “certified” factories is just a smokescreen — a Bearricade, if you will. The ICTI CARE Foundation has a searchable database of all the factories that are “certified.” Guess how many manufacturers pop up when you search for certified makers of “plush and soft toys”?
Zero.
And Build-a-Bear Workshop doesn’t appear anywhere on the ICTA CARE Foundation’s list of “retailers and licensors.” Ditto for the “Contributors” list.
So after the company finishes paying its fines for child labor-law violations in the United States, it can start talking about the conditions of China’s Bear-bones sweatshops. Which probably belch enough carbon to send Prince Charles to Copenhagen and back at least twice every minute.
My kid’s getting Barbie dolls this Christmas. At least there’s no controversy there. Right?
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Vermont Teddy Bears, people. Made in the USA.
Just damn.
I am giving a lump of coal for christmas. It gets the message across and also gets Big Al’s panties in a twist.
Good article. Exactly what I was thinking, CA Dave. Although Vermont is a lib-haven, but I guess ya can’t have everything nowadays. As long as Ben and Jerry’s doesn’t consort with VTBs I’m OK with them thus far.
The Ecojerks are working overtime lately to create nice little Brownshirts, aren’t they.
And Maxine Clark is backpedalling so fast:
http://www.buildabear.com/aboutus/OurCompany/Letterfrommaxineclarkwebisodes.aspx
“Our intention with the Polar Bear story was to inspire children, through the voices of our animal characters, to make a difference in their own individual ways. We did not intend to politicize the topic of global climate change or offend anyone in any way. The webisodes concluded this week with Santa successfully leaving on his journey to deliver gifts around the world. The webisodes will no longer be available on the site.”
Of course they never intended this to cause a shit storm … I love how these people never THINK in any way before they put things on the Net. After all, once it’s there, you can never, ever take it away.
And it would help if I followed all the links. Never mind ….
Indoctrination of the youth, that was always the first step of every religious cult or dictatorship.
Thing is, all that backpedaling can lead to falling on your ass. Your pampered, lying, hypocritical ass.
Didn’t it occur to anyone that this might be disheartening to children – a message that says “the planet as you know it might not be around in 10 years (or, apparently 1 week).”
I love the idea that the North Pole is melting in WINTER. Even Gore hasn’t gone that far yet (I think). How about having the bears encourage kids to not litter, and pick up trash? That actually WOULD have an impact.
I want to see some polar bears chowing on a bunch of environmentalists. Ice floes optional.
It could’ve be worse…the video could’ve told those kids if Obama doesn’t get his gov’t takeover of health care by Christmas Eve, Santa won’t deliver any of their presents.
I have decided to help Build-a Bear in their global crusade. Every time I am at the mall, I am gonna leave my cup of ice left over from my drink at their counter. I expect them to ship the ice to the North Pole.
Who’s with me?
Meeeee! And they can recycle the cup and make it into rafts for the poor sinking polar bears. Wow recycling really IS easy!
UnBearivable. Teehee. Had to go along with all the puns. But the story is quite ridiculous.
-Denise
This whole global warming stuff is getting ridiculas! Just yesterday I was listening to the tv and the program was saying that OUR PETS have twice as big a carbon foot print. Our dogs and cats! They even mentioned goldfish!
http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20091220/sc_afp/lifestyleclimatewarminganimalsfood
We should all just die… and take all the animals with us. You know, to save the planet.
That polar bear should worry less about Santa and more about his own shit… according to the article at least.
Mfrag, that article was hilarious! I love the part where he suggests eating your pet to eliminate its carbon footprint
…whatever happened to telling kids to hug trees through Tim Curry musical numbers and insane Robin Williams lab bats?
I’m serious. FernGully was pretty much the last save the rainforest/planet movie that I liked.
Santa Claus: Not Real
Talking Polar Bears: Not Real
Flying Reindeer: Not Real
Global Warming: Not Real
I think the whole thing is pretty consistant and ok with me. Why not throw in Bigfoot and the Lochness monster?
I have Ferngully on VHS. The polar bears and Santa will be okay, Captain Planet will save them. (This is what you believe if you grew up in the ’80s and early ’90s.)
Cap-tain Pla-net! He’s our hero! Gonna take po-lu-tion down to ze-ro!
Gonna help him put asunder! BADGUYS who like to…loot’n'plunder!
The article suggests buying from Vermont Teddy Bears instead. Not a bad idea, but take a look at FreeBears.com. They have 1,200 stuffed animals to choose from, including lots of teddy bears.