Jessica Biel’s career has gone nowheresville for a few years now, but it’s still kind of amusing for her cover story for February’s Vogue to harp on it so. Or in other words, in interviewer Jonathan Van Meter’s summary of her résumé:
“[I]ll-conceived remake of famous horror film; tragic Bret Easton Ellis adaptation; even more tragic Kim Basinger vehicle; meaningless third installment of Blade franchise; terrible movie; terrible movie … The Illusionist!”
Not only that but she has an excuse for why she’s more famous for being Justin Timberlake’s (former?) girlfriend than for acting:
The ‘Illusionist’ star – who is dogged by rumours that her relationship with Justin Timberlake is in trouble – believes she is too grounded and leads too much of a normal life for people to have a high professional opinion of her.
She said: “I might just be way too boring to ever be a really great actress.”
Vogue’s cover dubs her “The Refreshingly Real Jessica Biel,” but this is simply a new approach to her endless complaining about not getting good work. Remember last year when she explained her lack of success thus?
“I just want an opportunity,” she states in Allure’s June issue. “If you don’t like the audition, then don’t hire me! But if you don’t want to even see me — that’s hurtful.” Find out what else Jessica has to say about her looks, marriage, and living life under a microscope.
Is being too good-looking really a problem for an actress?
“Yeah, it really is a problem. I have to be blunt.”
Too beautiful and talented, yet too grounded and real — Jessica Biel has a whole host of problems. Let’s all feel bad for her.
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All you no talent uglies and fatties have no idea the anguish being grounded, real, talented and beautiful causes Jessica and myself on a daily basis.
Riding the horses at my stables, shopping sprees and making pouty lips for the camera helps but otherwise it’s just awful.
Possibly the greatest ass in Hollywood……..
I’m sorry, but I don’t find her attractive enough to watch on any screen. Not even this LCD screen. And she’s a barely passable actress. She’s also on the cover of this month’s Movie Entertainment (a Canadian publication that’s sent out to a specialty channel subscriber like us). The article is barely readable. It’s more of the above: I’m beautiful, I’m not using Justin, I’m an actress dammit, no one wants to give me a real shot, and lots of the interviewer crawling up her ass to reside. I read three sentences and threw up in my mouth a little. I turned the page and moved on with my life. She should do the same.
Tell ‘em Stan! What a hassle.
**goes back to arm curls**
“If you don’t like the audition, then don’t hire me! But if you don’t want to even see me — that’s hurtful.” – WOW!
Welcome to what 95% of professional actors/actresses go through everyday
She is the posterchild for the term “butterface”.
Sounds to me like she is making every excuse in the book for her lack of talent. Looks have nothing to do with it!
@Hurricane: I thought that was Tom Cruise. Oops, I thought you said the biggest ass in Hollywood.
To paraphrase what a friend said about Megan Fox, one day Jessica Biel will be 35 and we will be rid of her.
When she actually HANDS you the gun like that, it’s not even sporting anymore.
And StrawberryGirl, don’t count on it. I thought Demi Moore would be doing infomercials by now, but she’s still haunting us, courtesy of Twitter and Photoshop and her scrawny little sidekick. Husband. Whatever.
Ah, yes. Being grounded and living a normal life just dooms actresses. Though, I would love to know on what planet (Pandora?) constant world travel, designer clothes, pop star boyfriend and being overpaid for inflicting awful movies on the rest of us qualifies as a normal life. Please, someone let me live that norm. Let’s trade, Jessica. Except the drippy boyfriend. There isn’t enough money to make me want a guy who sounds like a girl and looks like crap.
“Put your d**k in the box. Make her open the box. Listen to her talk about how she WOULD open the box but she’s too beautiful and too busy keeping it real.”
““If you don’t like the audition, then don’t hire me! But if you don’t want to even see me — that’s hurtful.” – WOW!
Welcome to what 95% of professional actors/actresses go through everyday”
Lol not to mention the rest of the planet! We’re just not self-absorbed enough to think it’s personal. You know, I didn’t get an interview cause my a*s is so great. At least that’s what I always tell myself….
I thought Timberlake finally broke it off with her? maybe I need to spend more time at the checkout isle…
To paraphrase the lovely ladies of Go Fug Yourself (who were referring to a skirt Tara Reid wore that said “SEXY”): if you have to tell everyone, it might not be true.
Never really did like her. Now I just don’t give a damn. She’s not worth anyone’s time with that attitude of hers.
From a Babelfish translation of a post re: Biel, in a previous discussion here at Deceiver:
I think that about sums it up. Once you’re explained that it undresses still rarely completely, everything should clear right up.