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So we know that the Planet Green network is relying on celebrities like infamous carbon-hog Leo DiCaprio to spread their message of saving the planet through sanctimony. But did you know who Planet Green’s “exclusive automobile sponsor” is?
And of course, you know what GM manufactures:
Save the Earth, buy a Hummer.
(Hat tip: PR Watch)
This Sunday on Discovery’s brand-new channel Planet Green, Leonardo DiCaprio is debuting a 13-part series about Greensburg, Kansas. Greensburg was completely destroyed by a tornado last year and is rebuilding itself, in the words of the New York Times, as “the nation’s first Platinum city, the highest certification green design can attain.” Here’s Leo, telling us what’s what:
“We are in the Environmental Age whether we like it or not,” Mr. DiCaprio wrote in an e-mail message. “Unfortunately, our government has failed to respond to this monumental issue in the way they should. Until we become less reliant on foreign oil and put aggressive environmental policies into action, it will be towns like Greensburg, Kan., taking matters into their own hands on a grass-roots level. I am excited that my production company gets to be a part of a moment in American history where one town has decided to set the example for the green building movement.”
Now, it’s nice that he’s doing something to help a struggling community to rebuild. And if it just so happens to fit in with his little pet cause, good for him. (”Oh my God, it’s actually called Greensburg? That’s perfect!”) But his Olympian arrogance is a bit tough to take. Just as a reminder, here’s another glimpse at how Leo is reducing his own dependence on foreign oil:
What, he powers that estate with good intentions? Not to mention his insistence on flying around on private jets, and all the other planet-destroying luxuries he can afford. As Counterpunch (hardly a bunch of right-wingers) put it: “Using Leonardo DiCaprio to tell people to ‘recycle, reduce and re-use’ is kind of like asking a crackhead to promote cocaine abstinence.”
I’ll start listening to Leo’s blather about saving the planet when he shrinks his carbon footprint to no more than 10 times my own.
Fashionista.com makes an excellent point about something that is becoming more and more pervasive in fashion: the commodification of the “green” movement.
Lame-o teenybopper heaven Urban Outfitters is one of the worst offenders of this trend, but today I’ve got the budget-conscious retailer Forever 21 in my crosshairs.
The store’s most egregious wrong is a recent line of environmentally-themed graphic tees.
Not only are some of these shirts made in Asia in plants that process literally tons of synthetic materials (take this “Going Green” bag, made from 100% pure polypropylene), but the clothes then have to be shipped thousands of miles to be distributed to American stores.
Ooh, let’s all give Forever 21 a fat round of applause — they made exactly three tees from organic cotton. The air feels cleaner already.
As everyone knows, WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE FROM GLOBAL WARMING. What you might not know is that in the process, you can do something for an unfortunate soul who could really use your help. Namely, Al Gore!
Al is the chairman of Generation Investment Management, a company that… er… I’ll let them tell it:
Generation has built a global research platform to integrate sustainability research into fundamental equity analysis. We focus on the economic, environmental, social, and governance risks and opportunities that can materially affect a company’s ability to sustain profitability and deliver returns. Our research plays an important role in forming our views on the quality of the business, the quality of management, and valuation.
Exactly! And as part of all that, uh, stuff, GIM has just bought a $13 million stake in Camco International Ltd. And what do they do? They sell carbon offsets. You know, the things we’re all supposed to buy to make up for, say, flying all over the world in private jets and owning mansions that use 20 times more energy than the national average. Carbon offsets = Healed planet. Yay!
Now, some people want you to believe that Al Gore is “spreading global warming hysteria to benefit his own wallet.” Nothing could be further from the truth. He is selflessly devoted to saving our dying planet. He’s saving us from ourselves! And hey, if a few dollars happen to fall into his pocket here and there, is that so wrong? What have you got against an average joe just trying to make a living? Shame on you. I’ll bet you haven’t bought a single carbon offset today, have you? Tsk, tsk.
(Hat tip to all the Deceiver readers who sent this in)
Brad Pitt likes to talk about how he originally wanted to be an architect, which would have robbed us of such film classics as… Anyway, before he became 24/7 tabloid fodder, he wanted to design buildings for a living. And now he’s getting his chance!
Brad Pitt, the star of “Fight Club” and “Ocean’s 11″ who professes a passion for architecture, will be a design consultant for an 800-room hotel and resort Zabeel Properties plans to build in Dubai, the developer said.
Zabeel, based in Dubai, hired architecture firm Graft LLC to design an America-themed hotel in the United Arab Emirates city, the closely held developer said today in a statement… “Acting is my career, architecture is my passion,” Pitt said in the statement. As “my first major construction project,” the Dubai hotel will feature “environmentally friendly architecture, but also embrace my career in entertainment.”
What, Meet Joe Black posters above all the recycling bins?
It’s kind of funny that the hotel will be “environmentally friendly,” considering Dubai itself is the least environmentally friendly place on earth. Per capita, Dubai has the biggest ecological footprint in the world according to the World Wildlife Fund. (The United States is in second place, and everybody knows how much we hate the planet.) They keep littering the place with artificial islands that destroy coral reefs, they’ve got one of the busiest airports in the world, and they’re fond of building things like indoor ski slopes where you can cavort in the snow while it’s hot enough outside to roast a chicken. They’re rich enough to do any damn thing they please, no matter how decadent or how much it hurts the environment.
But hey… Brad Pitt!
(Hat tip to Deceiver reader Sophie Hall)
Sarah Larson, the Vegas cocktail waitress who’s been dating George Clooney for the past year, was interviewed in the new issue of Harper’s Bazaar.
In it, she talks about how they met, what their relationship is like, and how he’s a hypocrite (albeit a handsome one!) for driving a Prius to get to his Gulfstream V.
One thing that attracted her to Clooney was his work in Darfur: “It’s incredible what he’s doing over there, his passion to try to use his status to make a difference.” And though he has a hybrid, Clooney still flies private, which Larson considers “a walking contradiction.” But she says, “People get comfortable. [It's] baby steps.”
Comfortable is just a polite word for complacent, methinks.
Today’s edition of WE’RE ALL GONNA DIE FROM GLOBAL WARMING!!! comes to us courtesy of none other than:
The Prince of Wales has warned that the world faces a series of natural disasters within 18 months unless urgent action is taken to save the rainforests.
In one of his most out-spoken interventions in the climate change debate, he said a ÂŁ15 billion annual programme was required to halt deforestation or the world would have to live with the dire consequences.
“We will end up seeing more drought and starvation on a grand scale. Weather patterns will become even more terrifying and there will be less and less rainfall,” he said.
Sounds bad. So how is Chuck doing his part to save the planet? The same way as everybody else, silly!
Britain’s Prince Charles, eschewing pollution-spewing jets, is touring the Caribbean on a 246-foot megayacht, complete with hot tub, gym and 24-member crew.
Charles and wife, Camilla, the Duchess of Cornwall, arrived Tuesday on the first leg of a five-island Caribbean tour that the prince’s office swears will be friendly to the budget and the environment.
According to Clarence House, the couple’s plans to sail rather than fly between islands will reduce the trip’s carbon footprint.
He’s not kidding around with this stuff, people. Both his Jaguar and his Land Rover have been converted to run on biofuels. Every single one of his mansions has at least one compact fluorescent bulb, and all his servants have been instructed to breathe as little as possible. Heck, he’s even got a recycled wife! He’s inspired me. To do my part to stop Global Warming, I’ve instructed my driver to keep the Bentley under 55 when driving over the poor.
(Hat tip to Deceiver Fan #1 Pastafarian)
A few weeks ago Sean Penn organized something called the Dirty Hands Caravan, in which several biodiesel buses traveled from the Coachella Festival in Indio, CA to New Orleans, filled with the sort of people you’d find at Coachella. Plus Sean Penn. Along the way they did, like, good stuff:
The caravan… is the coming together of individuals encouraged to “get involved” in any way they feel compelled, whether its by cleaning up parks or neighborhoods, caring for the sick or needy, or speaking out on behalf of issues such as immigration reform…
As the bio-diesel buses make their way across U.S. cities, members of the caravan will be offered opportunities to volunteer on behalf of established local organizations. However, members of the caravan are free to choose whatever cause or do whatever good they feel inspired to do, whether it is officially organized or not. The goal of The Dirty Hands Caravan is to get people engaged and active in their world. Good works will be done, but the caravan’s overall mission is to “encourage individuals to take individual actions.”
Sounds a bit ill-defined, but hey, whatever makes them feel less guilty about having that much free time. One wit called it “a sort of feelgood A-Team,” which is about right. Or maybe it’s like the Merry Pranksters, except instead of dropping acid with Ken Kesey and having a blast, you get to go around pulling weeds and stuff with a sullen, humorless movie star. Whee. Well, at least it’ll give him something to talk about if he ever bumps into his ex-wife.
Anyway. Then this week he was at Cannes, and France has some strict new anti-smoking laws — which seems dumb because it’s, y’know, France* — but he went ahead and lit up in public anyway. Normally I’d say bravo, but it seems kind of hypocritical to talk about saving the environment and then make other people breathe the smoke from your rotten lungs. How about improving your immediate environment first? Act locally and all that.
Even if you don’t see the connection there, I think we can all agree upon the first principle that Sean Penn is a dick.
*I just meant that on the rare occasion I think about France, I picture everybody walking around smoking cigarettes. But if you want to take it as a slam against them because they’re a bunch of unwashed savages and now they don’t have all that cigarette smoke to mask the smell, that’ll work too.
Britain’s Daily Mail has a nice round-up of what they call “hippy-crites,” celebrities who want everybody else to ride the bus while they fly around on private jets.
Etc., etc. But remember: “At least they’re doing something!”
Quick follow-up on a story from a few months ago: We told you about how Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger, self-proclaimed environmentalist and signer of Cullyfornia’s Global Warming Solutions Act of 2006, has been flying back and forth every day in his private jet between his home in L.A. and his office in Sacramento. We all have our own ways of saving the planet, right?
Well, now Santa Monica residents and even members of his own family want to put a halt to Ahnold’s carbon-creating commute:
A federal judge will decide on May 15 whether the governor can land aboard a Gulfstream IV in Santa Monica, a 15-minute drive to his home in Los Angeles’ wealthy Brentwood enclave. The governor’s brother-in-law, Bobby Shriver, is among the Santa Monica city council members who voted unanimously on March 25 to ban large jets at the municipal airport.
“These guys aren’t listening so we have to lift the conversation to a different level,” said Shriver, referring to proponents of allowing the jets, including the U.S. Federal Aviation Administration. A surge in flights “has changed the whole safety profile of this little airport,” said Shriver, 54, a brother of California’s first lady, Maria Shriver.
Man, Thanksgiving must be awkward!
When told he might have to spend hours every day driving being chauffeured to Sacramento and back — or possibly might even have to live there — due to the meddling of a bunch of nobodies who’ve never made a single blockbuster, here was Schwarzenegger’s reaction:
(Hat tip to faithful Deceiver reader Pastafarian)
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