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Archive for the 'Sports Figures' Category

17
Mar

Michael Vick Wins Award for Torturing Dogs Courage

Perhaps it was the way he valiantly encouraged dogs to rip each other to shreds in the fighting ring. Or maybe the manner in which he drowned, hung, or otherwise dispatched the losers (very sportsman-like!).

Or it could have had something to with his fortitude in the face of a 19-month prison sentence/the wrath of animal rights activists/rehabilitating his image/personal finance problems … all so he could make his brave return to football.

But no matter what trumped-up reason Vick’s teammates came up with for nominating #7 for the Ed Block Award for Courage, this is about as hypocritical as it gets.

According to the Ed Block Courage Award Foundation Website, the award is designed to honor

…those National Football League players who exemplify commitments to the principles of sportsmanship and courage. Recipients are selected by their teammates for team effort, as well as individual performance.

The Ed Block Courage Award recipient symbolizes professionalism, great strength and dedication. He is also a community role model … He becomes an Ambassador of Courage for victims of abuse, violence and neglect.

After this year, I think the Ed Block folks may want to consider adding “human” to that last sentence.

I’ll spare you the gruesome details, but I think it’s safe to say that what Vick did to his dogs not only qualifies as “abuse, violence, and neglect,” but was also extremely cowardly. Not to mention that in many cases, violence toward animals is often the first sign of a violent pathology that can easily expand to include human victims.

Now I am not one of those crazy people who think Vick should continue paying for his transgressions for the rest of his life. He served his time. He did some apologizing, a little groveling, and a decent amount of (court-ordered) community service.

But I am also pretty sure that none of the above makes him a shoe-in for an award designed to celebrate courage. Just like animal abusers, many drug dealers, thieves, and maybe even murderers can all probably be rehabilitated. But does that mean we should celebrate the bravery of these criminals in “enduring the hardships” they brought on themselves?

Probably not.

But then again, we live in a world in which a prestigious university invites a corrupt politician to lecture about ethics, and Madonna is named an expert on marriage. So taken in that context, Vick getting an award for courage is probably not as surprising as it should be, but still, in my opinion, disgusting.

15
Mar

Johnny Weir Too Gay for the Gayest Show on Ice

First it was the PETA freaks trying to strip the fabulous fur off his Olympic fashion. Now it appears that the world’s gayest touring company — Stars on Ice — has deemed Johnny Weir (are you ready for this?) too gay to skate.

I know. It’s like the Church of Scientology rejecting Amy Winehouse for being too crazy. But there you have it.

This past Thursday, GLAAD reported that the two-time Olympian was apparently “not family friendly” enough for co-sponsors Smucker’s and IMG Entertainment’s now über-masculine lineup. (Which, for the record, still consists of guys in leotards twirling and leaping about on the ice.)

You’ve got to love the euphemism: “not family friendly.” In other words, gay as a maypole. Gayer than Christmas.

In response to this heartless snub, Weir confessed to Access Hollywood on Friday morning:

I’ve never been invited to do ‘Stars on Ice’ before, which is the only figure skating tour in the U.S., and it’s disappointing that I can’t perform for my American fans. . . all because I’m not ‘family friendly’ enough.

I have to wonder what led Stars on Ice to come up with that lame excuse for their blatantly homophobic decision. Certainly it didn’t have anything to do with Weir’s relationship with his own family, as GLAAD reports on its website:

To say that Weir is “not family friendly” would be a clear jab at his perceived sexual orientation. Weir is extremely involved with his family. He is putting his younger brother through college, and supports the family financially because his father’s disability prohibits him from working.

Yeah, that guy has no clue about family values.

Continue reading ‘Johnny Weir Too Gay for the Gayest Show on Ice’

27
Feb

Yurt-Dwelling Gold Medalist Lives Off the Grid, but Loves Her Flowers (Imported)

Olympic Gold and Silver medalist and PETA poster child Hannah Teter must think flowers grow everywhere, year round. From People:

“I went out last week and bought $200 worth of flowers and put them in my room by my bed – roses, lilies and lilacs,” the earthy Teter, 23, tells PEOPLE. “When you surround yourself with nature, it’s really powerful. Everything makes a difference.”  She doesn’t just surround herself with it, Teter reveals she’s a vegetarian and puts the best stuff in her bod.”

Ms. Teter is also apparently going “off grid” and moving into a yurt.  I’m sorry, I need to repeat that. Ms. Teter plans on moving into a yurt.

From People:

“In addition to eating healthy, Teter wants to live greener overall, too. “I’m moving into a yurt in the woods near my parents’ home in Vermont,” she says about inhabiting a portable tent-like dwelling.”

For all her love of getting comfy with nature and loving on the environment, what part of buying $200 of flowers make her green? It’s February.  Roses grow from late spring to late fall, but mostly mid-summer. Lilies grow from from mid-June to August. Lilacs grow from mid-spring to early summer. In February, despite how not cold Vancouver is, you still have to get roses, lilies, and lilacs from somewhere.

Here are two possibilities:

  1. Hannah is buying them from some super fancy climate-controlled greenhouse in Vancouver that uses electricity and fossil fuels to keep flowers growing abnormally throughout the winter.
  2. Those flowers were imported, traveling on massive container ships from some far off land, burning fossil fuel along the way. Which I have no problem with. But Yurt-girl might. Continue reading ‘Yurt-Dwelling Gold Medalist Lives Off the Grid, but Loves Her Flowers (Imported)’
18
Feb

PETA Attacks Athletes But Won’t Take On Entire Nations

Since Johnny Weir put his skating where his mouth is on Tuesday night (and will have another go during the long program tonight), I decided to do a follow-up to my earlier piece on the Skater-Haters at PETA. [UPDATE: Although he didn't medal, Johnny won many, many fans with his singular verve.]

Thanks to a comment by Deceiver fan Bruce, I thought “who else is wearing fur that PETA is keeping silent about at the Olympics?” Why, a number of countries had fur as part of their outfits during the Parade of Nations. (No, I’m not talking about the East German ladies’ back hair.)

This doesn’t even include duck down, or leather, or even the plumage worn by fellow American figure skater Evan Lysacek (of whom, if not for the gallery below, I would put a gratuitous picture in this post). [UPDATE: Lysacek won gold.]

Newsflash: PETA only wants Johnny Weir because of his talent for attracting the spotlight. I offer the following reasons why PETA decided to not attack the following countries’ fur-wearing during the Parade of Nations. Click each image to learn more and see if you can spot the fur!

Click below to read all the reasons at once.

Continue reading ‘PETA Attacks Athletes But Won’t Take On Entire Nations’

15
Feb

Save the Mink! (But Slaughter the Olympic Figure Skaters)

The Winter Olympics are finally kicking up some chilly powder in Vancouver. This means fame-whoring opportunists like PETA and other assorted kooks get to enter stage right and claim their five minutes of fame, while threatening to assault the athletes. What?!

Cats and dogs and mongooses (mongeese?) should never be threatened with slaughter, but it’s open season on Olympic skaters — who, you have to admit, are sort of like puppies. (Oh my, a hunting joke! Someone call the ASPCA!)

American figure skater Johnny Weird Weir, the all-around “just a little bit odd” guy (Did I mention male figure skater?) fears for his life during the Winter Games.

According to ESPN:

U.S. figure skater Johnny Weir says he received threats from anti-fur activists that made him fear for his safety, causing him to scrub any plans to stay at a hotel while in Vancouver for the Olympics.

From Reuters:

“There was a lot of attention put on a tiny piece of fur,” said the 25-year-old, the 2008 world bronze medalist. “While I do understand anti-fur activists views about fur and the fur industry, they aren’t part of my life. One thing that is horrible is when somebody pushes a belief on you like a religion. I was definitely threatened and felt very threatened. People are nuts.

“I’m an easy person to pick on because I’m very open I like fur and I like things that come from dead animals. It’s easy put your cause against an athlete going to the Olympic Games, it’s good free publicity for these activists. I’m not a huge politician that gets these threats all the time. I mean I’m a figure skater. It’s not normal to receive a threat that really threatens your life. It’s a very scary thing.”

They didn’t just go after him. They’ve threatened “contacted” his costume designer as well. (Costume designers get no love unless something goes wrong.) The entire episode has forced Weir to literally share a hotel suite with a female American ice dancer, who just happens to be his teammate’s ex-girlfriend.

The plot thickens! Well … no, not really. I mean, come on. He’s a figure skater.

Continue reading ‘Save the Mink! (But Slaughter the Olympic Figure Skaters)’

08
Feb

The Who’s Left Performs During Super Bowl XLIV Halftime

Written by Pete Townshend in 1965 at the age of 20:

People try to put us d-down (Talkin’ ’bout my generation)
Just because we g-g-get around (Talkin’ ’bout my generation)
Things they do look awful c-c-cold (Talkin’ ’bout my generation)
I hope I die before I get old (Talkin’ ’bout my generation)

Pete Townshend in 2010 at the age of old:

Talkin’ ’bout you’re geriatric.

26
Jan

CBS = Christian Broadcasting Service?

UPDATE: CBS is reportedly considering running a Super Bowl ad produced by a gay men’s dating website.

Say a prayer for me. I’m about to get controversial.

In a “why am I not surprised” move, CBS executives have decided that it would be perfectly consistent with their “longstanding policy of not accepting advocacy advertising” to air a pro-life (Ahem. excuse me, pro-family) ad during this year’s Super Bowl.

The $2.5 million, 30-second spot is sponsored by Focus on the Family and stars the bible-verse-eye-blacked Tim Tebow and his mother. Who is really glad she chose life, now that her son will soon be richer than Peyton Manning. As the Colorado Springs Independent reports:

The Focus ad supposedly features the story of University of Florida quarterback Tim Tebow and his mother. Pam Tebow and her husband were Christian missionaries in the Philippines in the ’80s, and during her pregnancy with Tim she developed amoebic dysentery. Doctors told her the strong drug they used to kill the infection had likely damaged the fetus, and they suggested an abortion. Pam refused. Tim was born healthy, won the Heisman Trophy in 2007, led Florida to the national championship a year ago and is a likely top draft pick in next spring’s NFL draft.

Don’t get me wrong. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with Tebow making an ad for a cause he believes in. Did you catch that? I’m going to say it again just in case: Tim Tebow, who does God’s work by winning football games, loves Jesus, unborn babies, and his momma, should make any pro-life-pro-Jesus-pro-whatever ad he wants to. Go for it. Good for him. (And good for Him too.)

And really, there’s nothing wrong with CBS deciding to air the ad (to be fair, the final decision has yet to be made), except for one little thing.

Continue reading ‘CBS = Christian Broadcasting Service?’

12
Jan

9 out of 10 porn stars, strippers and thugs agree: Fur is BAD

It’s been heading in this direction for quite some time. Don’t tell me you didn’t all see it coming, because I know you did.

The campaign began with a handful of legit celebrity backers, slowly oozed into has-beens and B-listers, and eventually delved deep into the realm of exaggerated or entirely trumped-up endorsements (ranging from The Dalai Lama to Michelle Obama). And now it’s, well, finally scraping the bottom of the barrel, isn’t it?

I keep thinking that anyway, and then every time I turn around there’s another truly WTF ad that makes me question myself.

Sure, it’s a bit suspect when folks who take their clothes off for a living would rather go naked/abstain from sex than wear fur or let little boy dogs keep their balls (Holly Madison, Jenna Jameson, Rick’s Cabaret strippers and now The Girlfriend Experience’s Sasha Grey).

But now PETA’s using the recently suspended NBA super-thug Gilbert Arenas. I have to wonder if there is anyone, anyone at all, in the entire PETA organization who is capable of grasping just how utterly irrelevant all these ads have become.

I can just see the Mark McGwire ad for PETA’s anti-hunting campaign: “Shoot steroids, not ducks.”

Yeah, and "Hugs, Not Drugs," "Shoot Hoops, Not Guns." Oh...wait...

Yeah, and "Hugs, Not Drugs," "Shoot Hoops, Not Guns." Oh...wait...

Continue reading ‘9 out of 10 porn stars, strippers and thugs agree: Fur is BAD’

04
Jan

Study confirms: Deceiver.com balances out the universe

edwardsHere at Deceiver, we don’t think of ourselves as doing much good for society as a whole. We rank ourselves somewhere between a colon cleanse company and Ipecac manufacturers. We have a great product, but we make a lot of people feel sick inside.

According to a recent Northwestern University study, though, we are helping restore balance to the universe. Yep, you heard me right.

It turns out that powerful people really do hold those beneath them to a much higher standard than they hold themselves. So nyah-nyah, it’s not just our enlightened proletariat opinion anymore. The study also confirms that people who don’t feel entitled to power let “the deceivers” get away with it.

We try not to let that happen here, of course. That’s the whole point. We play bookie to the social order, tilting the whole thing back toward center. And our mission has just been legitimized by science. (What WILL we use this new found power for?)

Continue reading ‘Study confirms: Deceiver.com balances out the universe’

23
Dec

Can-eh?-dian Olympics Ignite Snowball Fight?

CANADA/North of the border from here, things are different, from A to Zed.

In the great, cold land of Canadia, the political parties are “different” (read: confusing to me), and they talk funny (eh?), and “garage” rhymes with “marriage”, but a few things are the same.

They have hypocrites too, although in typical Canuck fashion, the compromising of one’s promises is all for the love of winter sports. According to The Canadian Press:

Nova Scotia’s NDP premier is going to the Vancouver Olympics and will accept a pass to all locations from organizers, even though his party sharply criticized his Conservative predecessor for his plan to receive VIP passes at the Games.

Premier Darrell Dexter said Tuesday he’s decided to go to the Games for four days to attend a Nova Scotia Day ceremony, and to participate in receptions that will showcase his province. He said he will have an “access pass” for himself and two officials from his office, but he couldn’t explain what the pass entitled him to. No other politicians will go, Dexter said, and he won’t sit and watch sports events.

So despite his National New Democratic Party attacking the games a year ago, and him basically getting elected because he was going to be budget-friendly instead of five-ring-circus-ey, grabbing power (and free tickets) changes a man. Either that, or “opposite day” is one of those Canadian holidays that Americans just don’t celebrate.

Dexter says he has no free Olympic tickets, but he does have “access passes.” And receptions to attend.  Potato, potahto. So it’s free booze and moose fajitas, is it?  How does he justify the expense?

Continue reading ‘Can-eh?-dian Olympics Ignite Snowball Fight?’




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