As they say, folks, ya can’t make this stuff up. Ad Age reports:

Michael Vick is in talks to become the new spokesman for PETA.

Yes, you read that correctly. The disgraced one-time NFL superstar serving prison time for funding an illegal dog-fighting ring is primed to do public-service ads for People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals upon his release later this month. According to three people with knowledge of the matter, the proposed endorsement is part of a comprehensive PR scheme aimed at rehabilitating the quarterback’s image and gaining him readmission to the league that banned him from playing.

Just a few months ago, PETA withdrew its previous offer to make Vicks a spokesman, because in exchange he wanted their support for his return to the NFL. Not only did they balk at that, but they demanded that he undergo a brain scan and psychotherapy to determine whether he’s even crazier than Ingrid Newkirk.

But now, even though they still want him to undergo a psych eval, they think he’s otherwise sane enough to represent their cause:

“I’m familiar with [the plan],” said Dan Shannon, director of youth outreach and campaigns for PETA. “We have been in discussions with Michael Vick, with his management team, about the possibility of him putting out a public-service announcement with PETA when he’s out of jail. We want him to discourage people from taking part in dog-fighting. I can do it until I’m blue in the face and it might not convince anybody. Michael Vick sure can. He can say, ‘Look, I did it, I was wrong, and it ruined my career.’”

Seems like a perfect match. But can pretending to be sorry, on behalf of a group that’s killed way more pets than he ever did, resurrect that career?

Hey, I know just the location for the PSA shoot: The dumpster behind the Piggly Wiggly.

Update: PETA says it’s not true. No word yet from the Vick camp.