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Archive for the 'Writers' Category



28
Jul

Perez Pwnz Opponent?

Quick followup on a story from a couple of weeks ago: Mario Lavandeira, AKA Perez Hilton, is suing Jonathan Wayne Lewandowski, AKA Jonathan Jaxson, for being mean to him. Hilton is more specific about it, of course, but once you strip away the legalese, that’s all it is. (The sordid details of their dispute are here, if you can stomach it.)

Jaxson has now announced that he’s fired his lawyer because he can’t afford the whole mess. In a post titled “Your (sic) Fired,” he writes:

So does this mean he wins? Possibly, but I will fight the best way I know on my own unless I am capable of retaining another attorney prior.

A recent story summed up the case the best and hopefully justice will be served in this silly thing. He has tons of money, but that shouldn’t equal justice for wrong doing (sic).

And the “story” link goes to my previous post about it. Thanks for reading, Jonathan! Almost makes me feel bad for calling you a “scumblogger.” Well, best of luck with your little slapfight. I’d say, “May the best man win,” but in this case none of those words apply.

23
Jul

Perez Be Hatin’

Why does Perez Hilton spend so much time in court? Maybe the courthouse has a really good cafeteria. The dullwitted, donut-demolishing diva’s latest target is a site called perezrevenge.com. According to the LA Times, Hilton (real name: Mario Lavandeira) is suing them for hurting his feelings. Whoops! I mean, he’s suing because:

The suit accuses the offenders of cyber-squatting and deceptive trade practices, with no reference to whether they look foolish in whatever they are wearing.

The defendants, who didn’t immediately respond to a request for comment, stand accused in the lawsuit of misleading the public by creating the impression that their site “is associated with and/or is otherwise authorized or endorsed by Lavandeira.”

A sound legal strategy. Here’s one of their attempts to make it look like Mario endorses them, from just yesterday:

Hey Perez, why did your VH1 show go off the air again? What were your Nielsen ratings? I have them, but unlike you, I won’t post them to make myself look better.

Posts like “The picture before and after that Blobber wouldn’t show” and “Wow. Mario Lavandeira is in denial” can only compound the problem. Or how about the lead-in to another recent post:

I am constantly surprised by the nonsensical rambling that I read at PerezHilton.com.

Imagine the audience’s confusion: “Wait, am I at PerezHilton.com right now? Or is this a Perez-approved site? There’s no possible way to tell!”

Mario claims he’s going after these people for piggybacking (no pun intended) on his, ahem, good name. A name he came up with all by himself, honest! He absolutely did not appropriate the name of somebody more famous to ooze his way into the spotlight. Nope, never happened…

(Hat tip: Deceiver reader Discordia)

21
Jul

Sean Connery Takes ‘The Pen Is Mightier’ for $400

In Sean Connery’s upcoming autobiography Being a Scot, he discusses his humble beginnings as the son of a house cleaner and a truck driver and his love of Scotland.

A couple of issues here:

For one, Connery hasn’t lived in Scotland for some time. Like for more than fifty years. He is a resident of the Bahamas and has been accused by some of tax avoidance because of the lenient income tax laws in the tropical nation. He denies the criticism but he also says he has no immediate plans to return to his native land.

Second, much has been made of his refusal to leave any of his $170-million fortune to his son Jason. Connery’s ex-wife Diane Cilento spoke of how difficult it’s been for Jason to please his father:

She claims that at one stage Jason, who now works as an actor and film director, threatened to change his name after Connery accused him of cashing in on his father’s fame.

Australian-born Miss Cilento told the Sunday Times: ‘Sean said, “You only got this (acting) job because your name’s Connery.” ‘Jason said, “Well, I’ll change it to something else.” Sean said, “If you do that I’ll f****** kill you.”‘

But compare that with Connery’s talk of his cold upbringing:

“The simple fact that my mother never kissed me or held me in her arms when I was a child has had lots of repercussions on my life.” Pointing at a portrait that his second wife, Micheline, painted, he added: “Can you see how my mother has a stern look and Micheline’s mother seems softer? Don’t you think that explains lots of things about me?”

It seems that for all his talk of home and hearth, he’s kind of a tightwad both emotionally and financially.

15
Jul

Perez Hilton: Lard & Order

Plus-sized professional prevaricator* Perez Hilton is heading back to court yet again! He’s being sued for $25 million by a geriatric nurse named Diane Wargo for publishing her name and e-mail address last December, after she sent him a very impolite e-mail from her work address:

Perez you are a FAT GAY PIG! Angelina is a ugly whore! You love her because she is a fag lover! Her brother is a gay little jerk just like your fat ugly ass! MANGELINA is a digusting gross skank!

Okay, so she’s no Oscar Wilde. Or even Oscar the Grouch…

Later that day, Wargo was fired from her job at the Menorah Park Center for Senior Living in Cleveland, and she says she’s been deluged with threats and invective from Hilton’s readers. According to her suit, he violated his own privacy policy by not getting her permission to give out her personal information. But according to Hilton’s lawyer, that policy only applies to blog comments, not e-mails, and Wargo had no expectation of privacy rights.

Gosh, this all sounds so familiar… Oh yeah, now I remember! As we told you back in April, the portly pap-plunderer is suing lesser-known scumblogger Jonathan Jaxson for, among other things, giving out Hilton’s cell phone number. Here’s the first part of Hilton’s complaint, courtesy of the Smoking Gun:

Hiding behind various aliases and intentional falsehoods, Defendant Jonathan Wayne Lewandowski, aka Jonathan Jaxon, aka Jonathan Taylor (”Jaxson”), an Internet blogger, embarked on a campaign to intentionally and maliciously interfere with [Mario] Lavandeira’s business by publishing a continuous onslaught of defamatory statements and publishing Lavandeira’s private cell phone number, while encouraging people to call that number to harass him. This conduct by Jaxson defamed Lavandeira and caused him to suffer extreme business interruption and constant harassment.

See how that works? If you violate Perez Hilton’s privacy and interfere with his ability to make a living, he’ll sue you. And if you say something that displeases Perez Hilton, he’ll invade your privacy and interfere with your ability to make a living.

Problem?

*Look it up, Mario.

08
Jul

More Nerdy Stuff About BoingBoing

Xeni Jardin is the BoingBoing blogger who recently admitted that she deleted (or as she keeps insisting, “unpublished,” as if there’s a difference) all references to her former friend Violet Blue. Somewhere between 70-100 posts, depending on who you believe, were all flushed down the Memory Hole. Even if a post only mentioned VB in passing, down it went.

Was this the result of a nasty romantic breakup? Or something more mundane, like an intellectual disagreement over trademark law? So far, nobody involved is saying. Here’s as specific as Xeni has been willing to get, as she told the LA Times:

It’s hard for me to articulate exactly how weird this is. Suddenly it became this big huge thing with all this public scrutiny and all this speculation. But at the time I just wanted to take this material down for a host of reasons that I don’t want to talk about in public because I don’t think it would do this person any good. We don’t blog in detail about every minute decision we make about what to publish and what not to.

…There wasn’t an attempt to hide it. And I didn’t bring it up again in part because it involved some personal, private stuff that I don’t tend to get into. Like whether someone’s character is this or that, or whatever kind of personal dirty laundry was involved.

Oh, okay! She’s actually doing Violet Blue a favor by letting people speculate about what this “personal dirty laundry” might be. She’s respecting VB’s privacy.

You know who else probably wishes Xeni had respected his privacy? Tomo Foote-Lennox. Back in 2006, he ran afoul of Jardin when the Internet content filtering software created by his company, Secure Computing, blocked BoingBoing in several Middle Eastern countries and at several U.S. corporations. Why, that’s censorship! So Xeni had no problem reporting that “numerous blogs were saying” Foote-Lennox had once posted to a Usenet newsgroup for adult baby fetishists. Here’s how Xeni couched it, in a BoingBoing post that has since been mysteriously unpublished deleted but can still be found at archive.org:

Much of the debate focuses on whether having allegedly participated in “diaper-lover” culture, as infant fetishists describe themselves, would disqualify someone from passing judgment over what online content children or adults are allowed to see.

We’re skeptical of this here at Boing Boing. We believe the problem isn’t that people allegedly into unusual sexual stuff have no business setting standards for others. The real problem: is anyone qualified to tell other adults — entire nations at a time — what they can and can’t access online?

Yeah, it’s not about what a consenting adult likes to do in his or her spare time. It’s not about interfering with the ad revenue of a blogger who can mobilize a lot of readers very quickly to dig up dirt on you. It’s about the higher principle. People should be able to access the information they want online.

Well, unless you want to access the BoingBoing posts that mentioned Violet Blue. That you don’t get to decide for yourself. And you don’t get to know why. Because it’s private.

Oh, and guess who dug up that “adult baby” connection? You’ll never guess.

“Who cares?” complaints can be left in the comments. Keep in mind that this whole BoingBoing debaclebacle has been covered in not just the LA Times but also the NY Times, CNBC, the Toronto Globe & Mail, the Chicago Tribune, and even G4. So I’m not the only one who stinks. As blogs grow more popular and powerful, we’re likely to see more stories like these.

(Hat tip to waraw and CCBC at Metafilter, as well as domoni.com)

03
Jul

Violet Blue Gets BouncedBounced from BoingBoing

If you don’t know who Violet Blue is, don’t worry. She’s just a sex blogger. Which is like a regular blogger, except even less interesting. But she’s known, in the circles where she’s known, for being affiliated with BoingBoing. You know, BoingBoing? The “directory of wonderful things”? The third most popular blog in the world? They’re the sort of people who you’d associate with the Internet, if you knew next to nothing about the Internet. Did you ever see the movie Hackers? The BoingBoing dorks are like that, except older and less plausible as actual humans.

They give a lot of lip service to “Information wants to be free” and other cliches, and they’re all like totally against censorship, man. Which is why it’s weird that BoingBoing has scrubbed almost all mention of Violet Blue from their archives. Most of the nearly 100 posts about her, and the accompanying links, are now gone. And as you know if you’re reading this, blogs need traffic like Will Smith needs attention.

BoingBoing hasn’t explained it at this point (beyond a vague and arrogant statement from BoingBoingers Teresa Nielsen Hayden and Xeni Jardin), but a blog called the Tomorrow Museum thinks it might be due to an SF Chronicle column Blue wrote slamming Amanda Congdon, yet another overhyped Internet “celebrity.” Valleywag has some other theories, if you’re still reading this far. Anyway, the point is: the Internet is no different than anything or anyplace else. It’s just faster.

Yes, I just wrote a whole blog post about another blog deleting posts about yet another blog. Don’t worry, I’ll come up with some more jokes about Jessica Simpson’s boobs before you know it.

P.S. If you’re still awake and haven’t slit your wrists, the LA Times has more about this nerdy nonstory here and here. And VB tries to figure out what she did wrong here.

P.P.S. Seth Finkelstein says it best: “For all the argument-Olympics of hairsplitting over rights, it all comes down to power, to might-makes-right. Boing Boing is not notable for extending charity and understanding to those they accuse of having committed ethical transgressions against openness and transparency.”

P.P.P.S. The story made today’s (7/6) New York Times.

28
Jun

Mini-Me Sues TMZ Over Sex DVD

ranae_shrider_verne_troyer.jpgVerne Troyer, the little guy who’s best known for his work with Mike Myers in the Austin Powers franchise and now the steaming pile known as The Love Guru, has sued gossipmonger TMZ.com for posting a sex tape starring the actor.

In the lawsuit (view PDF here), Troyer says he sent multiple cease-and-desist orders to the website both before and after they shared the video, which features the dwarf performer with his ex-girlfriend Ranae Shrider. The tape was allegedly stolen sometime in the past year.

The suit also names One Night in Paris porn peddler Kevin Blatt as a defendant for trying to broker a deal for the video’s sale through an online porn distributor. Blatt reportedly has received offers as high as $100,000 for the footage.

Troyer is seeking ONE MEEELLION DOLLARS in damages.*

And sorry, sickos: TMZ pulled the post after the lawsuit hit. You’ll just have to wait for someone else to leak it to satisfy your pervy intentions.

*Sorry, couldn’t resist. Multiply that by twenty.

26
Jun

Karolina Kurkova Criticized as Too Curvy in Brazil

karolina_kurkova.jpgVictoria’s Secret model Karolina Kurkova was bashed in the Brazilian press as too fat after walking the runway in the Cia Maritima show during Sao Paolo Fashion Week:

An article in a Brazilian paper about the leggy 5′11″ Kurkova described how “shocked” the audience was when she appeared looking uncharacteristically chubby with “cellulite on her butt.”

Btw, the photo at right was taken on Tuesday in Brazil. Yeah, what a fattie, right?

The thing that gets me is that the same Brazilian press was up in arms after Ana Carolina Reston, a local model, died of anorexia in 2006. Standing at 5′7″, she was 88 pounds at her death. It was pretty much 24-hour news coverage at the time:

“Take care for your children because their loss is irreparable,” Reston’s mother, Miriam, told the O Globo newspaper. “Nothing can make the pain go away. No money in the world is worth the life of your child.”

“I noticed something was wrong when she returned from Japan,” Miriam told the Estado de Sao Paulo newspaper. “She was too thin when she returned and when I told her to eat something, she would say: ‘Mom please don’t fight with me; there is nothing wrong with me, I’m fine.’”

It’s entirely possible that the some members of the Cia Maritima audience were as horrified as the newspaper claims, but is broadcasting that opinion news? I would say this sort of criticism of someone as gorgeous as she is qualifies as a mixed media message.

19
Jun

“Hos” Heckler, Hill, Hoped for Ha-Ha’s from Hitler Humor

We all remember the terrible events of April 4, 2007. That was the tragic day when radio personality Don Imus referred to the Rutgers University women’s basketball team as — DEEPLY, DEEPLY OFFENSIVE CONTENT AHEAD“nappy-headed hos.” This meanspirited remark sent shockwaves across the country and threatened to tear this great nation apart.

Fortunately, some were brave enough to mount the highest available horse and call for Imus to be fired. Among those stalwart few was ESPN.com’s Page 2 columnist Jemele Hill, who said on April 10, 2007:

If it were up to me, security would have escorted the longtime radio jock out of his CBS Radio cocoon with belongings in tow days ago. But for now, I’ll have to settle for a two-week suspension that doesn’t begin until next week. That’ll show him.

Days have passed since Imus, executive producer Bernard McGuirk and sports announcer Sid Rosenberg took turns taking cheap shots at the Rutgers women’s basketball team, but I’m still boiling because too many people continue to defend Imus behind lame free-speech arguments — remember, speech is free, but consequences are not — and the idea that black women just don’t know a good joke when they hear one.

Hill got her wish the very next day, when Imus was dropped from MSNBC, and the day after that, when he was fired from CBS Radio. A triumph for freedom! The freedom from being offended by anything, anywhere, at any time.

So, what has Hill, a true American hero, been up to since then? Oh, just insulting millions of people. According to the Boston Herald:

ESPN.com columnist Jemele Hill was suspended yesterday after sparking outrage by comparing rooting for the Boston Celtics to Adolf Hitler and nuclear war…

Yesterday, Hill amplified on her earlier apology for writing, “Rooting for the Celtics is like saying Hitler was a victim. It’s like hoping Gorbachev would get to the blinking red button before Reagan.”

“In expressing my passion for the NBA and my hometown of Detroit I showed very poor judgment in the words I used.”

Apparently heroism affects the memory, because Hill should have remembered that all of Imus’s apologies, even those he made in the presence of Rev. Al Sharpton himself, were completely futile. That’s the new rule, the rule Hill helped create: If you’re in the public eye and you say something that offends somebody, no apology will ever be sufficient.

As a very wise person once said: Speech is free, but consequences are not.

18
Jun

Lynne Spears’s Parenting Book Coming Out Soon

lynne_spears.gifThe long-awaited parenting book written by Britney and Jamie Lynn’s mom has changed a lot since it stalled following her youngest daughter catching a case of pregnancy.

Lynne Spears’s surefire bestseller Through the Storm: A Real Story of Fame and Family in a Tabloid World is set for release in September.

Also known as “just after she’s become a grandmother for the third time to a child who will surely need years upon years of therapy just to reach 18.” Hopefully without getting knocked up or divorced first.




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